Twelve Causes of Gender Confusion

Here are some suggestions:

1. Breakdown of the family – traditional gender roles are supported and developed by strong and positive relationships with the mother and father. At crucial times of development a boy’s development into a man is strengthened by his bond with his mother and then his bond with the father. Same thing with girls. A girl grows into womanhood through a strong positive model in her mother and a strong loving relationship with the father. When the marriage and family break down the chance for that positive experience can get twisted or go missing. The child’s ability to be sexually secure becomes shaky.

2. Disappearance of the extended family – traditional gender roles were also supported by an extended family culture which invisibly taught girls how to be women and boys how to be men. In extended family gatherings the women got together, cooked, chatted, supported one another and the girls saw that, wanted to belong to that and learned by daily living what it was to be a woman. Likewise, the boys were taken into the extended male gang with brothers, fathers, cousins, uncles and grandfathers. They learned there what it meant to belong to that clan and what it meant to be a man in that clan. With the disappearance of the extended family that support for gender clarity evaporated.

3. Feminism and Homosexualism – By these terms I am not condemning people who experience same sex attraction and I am not against equal pay and rights for women in the workplace. Instead I am referring to ideologies and behaviors which have intentionally altered traditional role models for boys and girls. If a child is surrounded by various expressions of sexual identity no wonder he or she becomes confused. The girl wonders, “Am I supposed to be a Suzy Homemaker or a career woman?” If boys and girls are taught a range of sexual behaviors and identities, and if they live with a range of varied behaviors it is no wonder that they are confused about which one they should be.

4. Rape and Promiscuity – Sexual promiscuity is rampant in our society. Children are sexualized at as early an age as possible. Middle school children are expected to be sexually active. In such a culture girls are often raped or date raped. Boys are preyed upon by older women and by older boys and men. For a child whose sexuality is still developing the experience is terrifying and confusing. If a girl is raped or goes through a series of one night stands with boys who don’t care for her what happens to her sexual and personal self esteem? What happens to her idea of herself and her femininity? It’s ruined. It is the same with boys who are abused, seduced and lured into sex. Their sexual identity–a very fragile thing–is also broken.

5. Artificial Contraceptives and Abortion – Think about it for a moment. Artificial contraceptives and abortion break the sexual act from the possibility of a girl or boy becoming a mother or father. Continue Reading