Obama meets with Biden, Clinton _ UPDATED

August 16, 2012 By

Apparently today President Obama met with his gaffe-stricken veep and his Secretary of State. A few wags have suggested recently that a put-upon Obama may “switch” these two — putting Biden at State (John Kerry will be crushed, and our diplomatic relations may never be the same, anywhere) and Hillary Clinton on his ticket.

Mrs. Clinton would certainly be a better debater against Paul Ryan than Biden.

Lots of opinion out there. Some think Hillary won’t do it — that she and Bill Clinton are still miffed at the Obama team for playing the race card on them in ’08. Others think Hillary will do it because as veep she will be perfectly positioned to run for president in 2016.

Four years ago, when Sarah Palin first arrived on the national scene — when she was helping McCain’s poll numbers before it all collapsed — I imagined this little scene; a meet-up between a harassed and panicking Clinton and Barack Obama.

So, I was a few years too early. Here we are in ’12 and a panicking Obama has Bill Clinton keynoting the convention, and he’s taking a meeting with Hillary. Because no matter how much some want to tell you that it’s “Obama’s party now” the truth is, it still comes down to Don Clinton and his Consigliere:

So, it appears that “The One” is going begging to Don Clinton, hat in hand:

The One strides in confidently and extends his hand to The Don. The Don looks up, contemplates the proffered hand, and watches The One’s smile fade as it is not shaken. The One retracts his hand, and tilts his head, comprehending, but not liking it. Still, he needs this meeting.

Don Clinton nods slightly, and with a silky hand motions The One to take a seat. Don Clinton’s blue eyes are grave, but there is a noticeable twitching about his mouth, as though he is suppressing a smile, or sucking on a peeled grape. He remains silent. The One looks about the room in discomfort, waiting for an opening. Don Clinton makes a point of playing with his pinky ring, and gives him none. Finally, clearing his throat and assuming a cavalier affect, The One speaks:

The One: Uh, thank you, Mr. President, for seeing me in your beautiful offices.

Don Clinton nods, but says nothing. More praise is due.

The One: I, um, think it’s er…a wonderful, a wonderful testament to your, eh, your um, unquestionable commitment to em, the uh, your solidarity with the black community.

Don Clinton, remembering when The One played the race card on him, narrows his eyes and does not smile. He leans back in his chair and waits, squinting through the smoke, his cigar tilting upward in his mouth, ala FDR. More praise is due.

The One: It – it was a masterstroke of erm, brilliant racist-baiting, erm…a stroke of masterburbating, uhhhh, stroking, ermmm…a master…stroke…of getting back at the Republican jerks who impeached you and foreplaying, I mean forestalling any future innuendo or scandals intern erm…in turn.

Don Clinton’s eyes are ablaze with anger. The One, too cool to cower, crosses his legs and wishes for a teleprompter.

The One: What I mean, is, uhm, when Charlie Rangel suggested you taking offices here, it just uhm, under- underscored your lifelong commitment to fairness and your emm, legacy of commitment to small community underprivileged paradigms and archetypes of social architecture of your gravity and boundless past and future greatness. Um. Mr. President.

Don Clinton leans back in his chair, highly amused. He takes the cigar out of his mouth.

Don Clinton: Jonah Goldberg.

The One: Excuse me?

Don Clinton: Jonah Goldberg told me to take my offices to Harlem, not Rangel. Rangel got me to build a house in the Dominican Republic.

You can read the rest, here

UPDATE: Ed Morrissey says Obama would not dare change Biden for Hillary if it looked like he was taking Sarah Palin’s advice on it. I had the same thought.

Jim Geraghty takes it further:

First, it would require President Obama to admit a mistake. Secondly, it would de facto concede that the critics who deride Biden as an ill-informed, tactless, often obnoxious, loudmouthed, bloviating rhetorical time-bomb have been right all along. Thirdly, no one would believe the “sudden health crisis” or other story put forth to explain the switch. Fourth, there’s no automatic slam-dunk replacement. Think Hillary Clinton wants to jump in two months before Election Day to help save Obama from his own bad decisions?

I guess it comes down to how much Hillary believes in Obama’s “progressive vision” because if he is re-elected, she becomes the veep to a president who has already let slip that once he’s re-elected, he’s answering to no one and nothing.

Filed Under: 'Remaking' America, Barack Obama, Bride at every wedding..., Our Hillary!, Sarah Palin, Send in the clowns
About Elizabeth Scalia
  • http://jscafenette.com Manny

    I think Obama might just want to do it. I think he’s at a point of desperation. He can’t get to 50% in any poll, which is a sure sign of defeat. He’s soon going to be at a money disadvantage, which will allow Romney to make the case against him. He needs to change the dynamics. Will Hillary take it? I don’t know. Does she want to go down with a sinking ship? Even if by some miracle Obama wins, then if she wants to run on her own in 2016 she will have to carry Obama’s record and policies. I don’t think she really wants to be associated with that.

    Now even if she takes it I don’t think it will make a difference in the election. The economy is the economy and making a vice presidential shift is a very visiable, tangible image of a failure of his four years. Every time they see Hill voters will remember waht a failure he’s been.

  • Katherine

    That was a brilliant bit of writing. I hope you get an instalanch for it.

  • Debbie

    Obama is too toxic for Hillary. If she throws her lot in with him now, her future political aspirations would be in peril. This is what the Obama’s get throwing the Clinton’s under the bus in 2008 when they opined that they would not want to be living a few doors down from them in the same house.

  • TXRed

    I do not think it would help him, except with those voters who will vote for Pres. Obama just because he is Pres. Obama. Sec. Clinton has a very, very poor foreign policy record these past three years, to put it mildly. After the “reset” with Russia, the Arab Spring, the administration’s alienation of Britain and Israel, Clinton’s not encouraging most favored nation status for Columbia because of US labor union opposition (based on practices that Columbia stopped a decade ago), and the lack of support for El Salvador and Nicaragua against the resurgence of leftist attempts to corrupt the governments and constitutions, Sec. Clinton would not be a good choice for VP. Yes, she is a woman, but she is an unsuccessful Sec. of State (something that is not gender limited, I must add!)

  • Tregonsee

    I am not one to attribute good motives to Slick, but I have no doubt that he realizes that BHO is a failed* president, working hard on being a disaster. Hillary’s chances, and the country’s, will be MUCH better after a relatively benign R&R administration. There will be a cost in stopping and repairing the damage, all necessary, and she can run as the third Clinton term. If she were part of a failed BHO reelection bid, or worse a successful one, she can look forward to baking cookies.

    *Substitute a less benign term if you wish

  • lethargic

    OT, but can’t find how else to contact you, Ms. Scalia … Maggie’s Farm has disappeared from your blogroll … I use your blog as my portal to the Catholic/Political weboverse … can you put Maggie’s Farm back or was it intentionally taken off? Just a convenience for me and just curious. Thanks for your wonderful work and always thoughtful posts … God bless.

  • Debbie

    Agree with post above… Love your blog and would like the links for Maggie’s farm and Althouse back. Thanks Anchoress!

  • Not funny

    The only race-baiting I remember from ’08 was geraldine ferarro, but one must not speak ill of the cold, crumpled dead.
    Hillary will run if she can come up with $200 million before mid-September, but as i recall she needed Barack to pay off her campaign debts last time.

    As far as Bill clinton is concerned, no offices in Harlem will ever make up for doing absolutely nothing during the genocide in Rwanda(catholic). Nor can he turn back the clock and repair the damage to working class people in Mexico(catholic) and the U.S. under NAFTA, attacking Haitian(catholic) sovereignty, OR EVEN RACE-BAITING someone like Sistah Souljah back in 1992. Or did Scalia forget that one?!?

    So, p-p-p-please spare me the only-in-proper-white-company B.S. I am a 12th generation African-American, and I have no problem with newcomers like Romney or Obama becoming/being president. But I sure do have a problem with a particular “DON” of poor reputation returning his smelly, muddy Arkansas boots to the Executive Mansion in any capacity.

  • LisaB

    “Ed Morrissey says Obama would not dare change Biden for Hillary if it looked like he was taking Sarah Palin’s advice on it.”

    I had the same thought, too. Thank you Palin for making Obama stick with the crazy old uncle…. God save us from that man taking over the Presidency in an emergency!!

    Ditto for me on the Maggie’s farm and Althouse links – I use your website as a portal – you are a daily must read for me so that’s where I start my browsing.

  • conservativemama

    Just love watching Sarah Palin leave her mark, even from faraway Alaska.

  • http://www.stblogustine.com Matt

    It seems that Biden is a liability when allowed out on his own in a situation he feels relaxed enough to lift the filter between his brain and his mouth. But in the VP debate four years ago, when it mattered, he was rather solid. I wouldn’t assume he’d drop the ball against Ryan this outing as he will likely hold his own. In other words I wouldn’t sell him short.

    That being said,… did I actually hear that Hillary was planning to step down from her sec. position at the end of Obama’s first term, anyway? Or was that merely rumour?

  • Jenny

    I disagree that Biden was solid in the debates four years ago. He was pulling numbers out of his rear-end and the moderator never called him on it. I agree he didn’t *look* idiotic, but his facts were more like wild conjecture. Of course, it’s not like the press would call him out on made up junk this year either, so your point is taken.