Church Sign Epic Fails, “Beer in Hell” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Beer in Hell” Edition December 16, 2012

The biggest challenge of beer in hell is keeping it cold. Maybe that’s why it’s hell…

Thank goodness I’m a scotch man; I can still go to heaven! And really, you only go to hell for drinking beer if you put a piece of fruit in it. Heresy!
I really wish he would have died for Krispy Kreme instead.
They must be on the Mayan calendar or something. Did I miss a meeting?
Yes, and after you do, the archangels hold up scorecards and vote you out.
You should see this guy’s business card. Actually unrolls like a big scroll. And that “inc” at the end really lets you know it’s legit.
Always a good idea to confabulate our understanding of God with a mythical character we later explain to our kids is actually just made up. No set-up there at all!
So we’ll know it’s the rapture when all the churches are floating up to heaven? Could have made it easier on God and put them all on floating foundations.

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  • Chad

    I fully expect there to be beer in heaven. Good Scottish ale in fact.

  • When I think of all the sanctimonious a**holes who’ve “gone on to a better place”, Hell doesn’t sound so bad. Even if they do put fruit in the beer.

    • As long as it’s Blue Moon with a slice of orange, I’m there. That stuff rules!

  • Amy Wharton

    Separation.

  • Michael Pullmann

    My favorite part of the first sign is the incorrect, contractive “it’s”.

  • Ryan

    At least the place with the insanely long name had a woman overseer…