To My Friend Whose Marriage is “Pretty Much Dead”

I believe there’s hope for EVERY marriage IF both the husband and the wife want to make it work and are willing to do all they can to make it work. There’s no one-size-fits-all solution, but I believe the following FOUR ACTION STEPS could not only prevent divorce but create a beautiful marriage out of a broken mess. In no particular order…

1. Commit to counseling AND a weekend retreat for couples in crisis. 

Counseling is an important part of the solution, but sometimes it takes getting away and have a few focused days to kickstart the healing process. There are some great counseling and retreat options at NationalMarriage.com, MarriageToday.com, AACC.net, and we also have an online program for couples in crisis at FightingForMyMarriage.com.

2. Restructure your schedules to spend daily, uninterrupted time together.

Communication in a marriage is like oxygen for you body…it keeps you alive! When your marriage feels like it’s on life support, you might need to radically readjust your schedules to make sure you’re connecting daily. Make sure you have at least thirty minutes after the kids are in bed to talk with no electronics to distract you (TV, phones, etc.). Try to touch each other during this time. I’m not saying this will or should always lead to sex, but just showing basic physical affection or giving a foot rub can create more intimate connections between you and your spouse.

#3 might be the MOST important one on the list...