Have you ever had one of those days? You know, when you’re too sleep deprived to open your eyes, and your stomach is growling because you have not had much time to eat, but you are too overwhelmed with your list of responsibilities to do either one? So you just end up writing a blog about it? Well, the other day, I found myself in just this situation. It was not fun. Quite debilitating and immobilizing, in fact. It’s even worse... Read more
It’s Easter Morning for many Americans today. Christian parents all over America are bringing their children to church this morning, if they attend church at all. This is where they are reminded that Easter is not really about the fun childhood tradition of Easter egg hunts, but much more–a crucifixion, an empty grave, and “Jesus loves us.” This brings me to reflect on the role that religion plays in parenting. I have met many adults who are turned off by... Read more
It’s 2am and you cannot sleep. Maybe it’s a tense relationship that is stirring up all your ill feelings. Maybe it’s an issue at work that’s still stressing you out. Or maybe you just need to get something off your chest. This post was originally going to be titled “The Dangers of Blogging,” but then I remembered that I’ve been wakened in the middle of the night many times before I started blogging. It didn’t start with my book project,... Read more
For those of us living in America from Asian ancestry, this question will dog us at some time or another. We are technically and practically both. It is difficult to choose one over the other. And yet, when we think of what it means to be Asian or American, we have to break down these social constructs into their finer elements. What does it mean to be Asian, besides the obvious of coming from Asian parents or an Asian country?... Read more
It is every mother’s worst nightmare. Her precious child, raised with such hard work, sacrifice, and devotions, has again brought dishonor to the family. How can this be? How can the teacher claim that my son is the bully? Surely Tyler did not start it. Surely, he was just reacting in self defense. Your mind is reeling thinking of how he’s just a big kid whose feelings were trampled on over and over again. How can she blame him for standing... Read more
This is my first blog written for Asian Americans moms. Who are we and how are we different from other American moms? We are a diverse group. Even though there are distinct differences, for the purpose of this blog, I will not differentiate between the diverse countries of origins (Thailand, Philippines, China, Vietnam, etc…). I also do not believe in meaningless, superficial classifications of people such as superior or inferior, good or bad, but just what is. Demographically, we differ by acculturation... Read more
Some days, moms just want to crawl in bed and pretend she’s childless again. We want the whole day erased, completely undone, as if it had never happened. We cannot believe how our kids can be so rotten, or how we could have behaved so shamefully. When will this day be over? When will we get the chance to hit the reset button, that is if we dare get out of bed tomorrow to start all over again. Maybe we... Read more
Many schools across America have addressed violence between students in the form of Anti-Bullying campaigns. However, this has not stopped the widespread concern from parents that their kids are still getting bullied by peers at elementary or middle schools. In the past seven years of my private practice, I’ve counseled dozens of children and their families in which physical aggression was involved one way or another. Of all those families, no bully has come forth, just victims. However, from working with these... Read more
Look at those adorable, precious little beings we call kids. They aren’t very big but even before they reach puberty, these cuties can do so much damage. The parenting journey has taken us to ugly places we never knew existed. As wonderful as they are, our kids hurt us. They have no clue what they are talking about oftentimes when they insist on arguing with us. They seem to believe that just because we make and enforce the rules-we are... Read more
If you’re like me, you’ve got 429 things to do and not enough time in the day to do them all. Gotcha–these tongue in cheek cliff notes are for you. Begin by prioritizing your list of things to do, probably into groups of one hundreds (you can discard the rest). The first 100 should all have to do with the safety and health of your loved ones. This would include any spouses or kids. 1) Focus on keeping them alive... Read more
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