The six kinds of agnosticism

David Swindle, a self-described “agnostic theist” describes six different kinds of agnosticism.  Click here for explanations of each one:

1. Agnostic-Atheist-Materialist-Scientist: “God probably doesn’t exist but I won’t say so absolutely because that would reveal that deep down I’m just as dogmatic as the Jesus Freaks I live to mock and that I’m just using science as a rhetorical device to dupe people into respecting my materialist theology.”

2. Agnostic-Atheist-Postmodern-Contrarian Jerk: “I don’t know if God exists and I’m not interested in finding a real answer. Instead what I care about is telling others how stupid they are for sharing their religious beliefs. Both atheists and Christians need to shut up in their dumb fight so they can listen to me and realize that I’m so much more humble and advanced than both of them.”

3. Agnostic-Indifferent: “I don’t know if God exists and it’s not really something I think about much.”

4. The Christian Agnostic: “Something amazing happened in Jerusalem 2000 years ago.”

5. The Mystic Agnostic: “Maybe there’s something spiritual going on — there probably is — I’m just not sure what it is yet.”

6. The Mystic Agnostic Inter-Faith Ethical Monotheist Seeker: “There’s something spiritual going on and if we want to label it ‘God’ then that works. My agnosticism is not in whether God exists, but which God(s) are best and what it means to worship them.”

So are the latter varieties more open to Christianity, or is their smattering of religion an inoculation against the real thing?