Being pretty has never come naturally to me. I like the concept in theory, but I don’t have the patience for it. I grew up immersed in that world where gender-equality was translated as prove you can do everything a boy can. The going entertainment-industry trope was the odd-couple pairing of the pretty girl who was beautiful but whiny and useless with the tomboy who got things done and then got a makeover at the end of the movie. That culture breeds misogyny.... Read more
Tip for you: Don’t read a book about the history of tuberculosis while you’re laying around listlessly with a persistent cough. On the other hand, it’s a great book. When you want to learn a little bit about a new topic, children’s non-fiction is a good place to start. I actually picked this one out for my daughter, who’s interested in gory topics, but then it was sitting around, so I read it. Now I’m double glad I didn’t... Read more
My chief occupation this Memorial Day was doing things to prevent my lungs from making interesting squeaky sounds (no, really: the squeaking was fascinating — and harmless, as it happened, which adds to the appeal), and that means watching movies. These are the ones that are worth your time, and I’m looking at you, Julie Davis. Still Life A decade or so ago I inherited a collection of poetry, one of those mass-market-intellectual anthologies that was so popular back when... Read more
Late this afternoon I gave up all pretense that my runny nose might be allergies and conceded the ugly truth. It’s a cold. Minor disappointments follow: Missing the Pentecost sequence again (I hate that), missing the chance to go to Mass on Memorial Day again (double hate). Now what usually happens when you are a sickly person who comes down with some kind of common complaint is that people who love you immediately inform you of all the reasons you are responsible for... Read more
Having just observed how desperate Catholics are for serious discipleship, I’d be remiss if I left you hanging on how to meet that need. Here’s about fifteen years of experience with discipleship groups across a variety of contexts (evangelical, Catholic, young adult, grown-ups, mixed-generations, mixed-gender, single-gender, etc. etc.) summed up in a blog post that will, yes, actually tell you what you need to know. To start a discipleship group you need three things: 1. A leader. 2. An excuse... Read more
In conversation with Devra Torres, she commented: I’m starting to think that the habit of EVER addressing persons in clumps is a terrible idea, even though it seems so efficient and realistic. In fact, that’s one of the main points of personalism, but one that’s taking a while to sink in for me. Her remark couldn’t have been better timed. One of my challenges lately has been explaining to bystanders that what often looks like a “club” or a “clique”... Read more
Unclear on the concept is abounding these days. Michelle Arnold shared the link to this terribly twisted approach to marital relations and all I can say is no. Just no. For a clear-headed discussion of the patriarchy movement in general, here’s those wild liberals at HSLDA stepping up to disown this nonsense. Christianity is not about this. Just no, never, no way no how, end of story. What is marriage? The free gift of self between husband and wife. It’s faithful,... Read more
A friend passed on this article, about a public high school coach who texted her students a photo of a man licking the teacher’s ear. You can read the article if you want to know more about the contents of the image. Here’s the part we want to talk about here: “This picture is extremely inappropriate,” Mafes said. “If she had on what I have on and he was licking her ear, it would still be extremely inappropriate.” Mafes doubts... Read more
The headline sets aside the question of pre-Fall living, which none of us are doing. It’s the 16th of the month, which means I’m pre-prayed. Naturally I completely forgot and re-prayed this morning, which you’re allowed to do. I can’t remember what thoughts I had this morning, but here’s where my thinking went last time I reflected on today’s Gospel: Lord, I don’t understand everything. I’m struggling with difficulties that are leaving me feeling completely lost and maybe even abandoned.... Read more
I wrote the following in response to a “What would you say?” question from Sherry Weddell, who shared in a private forum the comments she’d received from a discouraged-but-faithful Catholic. The details hardly matter. We all know the territory. Here’s my answer, and couple follow-on comments come after. *** Dear Friend in the Field,You’re absolutely right. Catholics are horrible and evangelization can drive you mad. It’s pretty common for people who are serious about the faith to go through periods... Read more
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