In Which Sally Learns about Sexism

This year’s Fields Medal went to Maryam Mirzakhani, an Iranian mathematician at Stanford. The Fields Medal is the mathematics equivalent of a Nobel Prize, and this is the first time in its history that it has been awarded to a woman.

Someone sent me a link to this story, and told me I should show it to my daughter Sally, with her interest in science. There’s only one problem—Sally doesn’t know that women have yet to achieve equality in the maths and sciences. In fact, she doesn’t know that women have yet to achieve equality in any area of our society. Sally knows that her mommy and daddy both have jobs, and both take care of her and Bobby. She proceeds from the assumption that both men and women are full participants in each part of our society. She has yet to learn otherwise.

Sally recently noticed a picture of Hilary Clinton, and I told her who it was, and that she was considering running for president when Obama’s tern was up. Sally’s response? “Good, it’s the girl’s turn next!” Sally does not know that we have yet to have a turn. In Sally’s world, girls can do anything—and women do everything.

But you know what? Sally’s five. If I don’t talk to her about this, she’s going to start picking it up somewhere else. So I’m going to take a quick break from writing this post and go find Sally. I’m going to break this news to her. Then I’ll come right back and finish the post with the conversation below. Enjoy these lovely pictures of little girl superheroes in the meantime!

Okay, I’m back! Here goes!

* * * * *

“Sally, did you know that there has never been a woman president in our country?”

“What?” Sally looked up at me, inquisitive.

“Look at this picture. These are all of the presidents we have.” I’d brought my laptop, with a picture of all of the presidents pulled up on it.

“I don’t see any longed hair ones,” Sally said, after scrutinizing the picture.

“That’s right,” I told her. “We’ve never had a woman president.”

“What. The. Heck.” No really. That was her response.  

“What do you think about that?” I asked her.

“Strange.”

“No woman has ever been president because of something called sexism,” I told her.

“Sexism? What’s sexism?”

“It’s the idea that women shouldn’t be making the big decisions, that only men should make those decisions.” Yes, I was simplifying here, but the topic at hand was female presidents, so I figured it would work.

“When will our law change?” Sally asked, concern on her face.

“Well, the law technically already changed,” I told her. “The thing is, not enough people are willing to vote for a woman for president.”

“I would vote for a woman,” Sally told me matter-of-factly.

“Well then, maybe can will be a part of that change.”

“Okay,” Sally said, nodding. “What else can I do to help?” Ladies and gentlemen, I think I just created a feminist.

“Well,” I said, thinking, “anytime you hear someone say, ‘A girl can’t do that,’ you can tell them that that’s ridiculous, girls can do anything just like boys can.”

“Okay,” Sally said confidently.

“Hey, let me show you this,” I said, pulling up a picture of Maryam Mirzakhani. “This woman, Maryam Mirzakhani, she just won the Field Metal, for being the very best mathematician. She is the first woman to ever get that prize. Before her it was all men. It is woman like her who are changing things. If you work hard, you can change things too.”

“I am working hard!” Sally told me. “Today at school, I started pumping on the swing with no one even getting me started! I just waved my feet like this, and I got it started!” She was now laying on her back, her legs up in the air, demonstrating.

“Good,” I said with a smile. “You keep working hard.”

And that is where the conversation ended—for now.

* * * * *

So there you have it. I told Sally and that went way better than expected. Now I feel like I need to take her to the library and get books on Marie Curie and other important women in the maths and sciences, and possibly some books on important female politicians and activists as well. Any recommendations?