What the hell is this?!
Say what now? Is this “Make Women Great Again” conference in fact run by men? Yes! Yes, it in fact is! And they’re not shy about it! “The world’s ultimate event for women, by men,” their website trumpets. Every single one of their speakers is male. (You can find these speakers—and their areas of expertise—listed at the bottom of the conference page.)
I read through the conference webpage, which offers summaries off the various topics and issues addressed, and came away with several themes.
— Feminism makes women act like men, belying their natural feminine nature. What this feminine nature is is never explicitly defined, but, it’s not hard to read between the lines.
— Women are by nature submissive and oriented toward the home and motherhood. Women are happiest when they accept that this is their nature, and act like it.
— Finally, women should focus on pleasing men by becoming perfect wives and perfect feminine babes, both physically and in temperament, values, and attitude.
If this sounds like a lifestyle designed not for women but for patriarchal men, you’re onto something! What do men get, in this paradigm? They get a wife who stays at home and raises their kids, submits to their every wish and desire, and lavishes them with praise, worship, and sexual favors on demand. What do women get? Nothing. They get nothing.
Of course, according to the men selling this lifestyle, women get happiness and fulfillment because women, by nature, want to stay home, raise kids, obey their husbands, give up the ability decision making or offer input, and be submissive and available in the bedroom.
One wonders: would a man be happy in such a situation? The manosphere has an answer, of course: no, but only because men and women are different! They act like women are a completely different species—perhaps not even human—and then they have the nerve to wonder why so many women would rather stay single than marry men like them.
One last thought before I take a more detailed look at the conference description. It’s odd how similar all of this is to the patriarchal views I grew up with, with one exception—the religious language is absent. Completely absent. I’m trying to figure out what that means.
Are the religious and secular versions of patriarchy the same level of scary? On the one hand, the religious version includes religious coercion—God wants you to be a submissive wife. On the other hand, it also contains some cautions to men—to treat their wives well—that seem completely absent in the secular version. On the other hand, men in patriarchal religious communities are frequently not very good at following these cautions.
Trying to rank them is a mistake. They’re equally dangerous. On a visceral level, the secular version feels scarier to me at the moment because it’s newer to me. The enemy I know, versus the one I didn’t—until relatively recently. I knew there were “mens’ rights activists” and the like, but this? This just feels more cohesive to me—it’s a full worldview not just angry men spouting off—and thus more dangerous.
This movement also feels closer to power in 2020 than it did in, say, 2014. They have “Make Women Great Again” red hats that look just like MAGA hats. They’re consciously linking their movement to Trumpism. You can’t pretend it’s as isolated as you good in the past—and I am genuinely concerned about their ability to reach and radicalize white male college students.
It’s not that secular patriarchy is scarier than religious patriarchy. It’s that the existence of secular patriarchy is a painful reminder to many of us that leaving religion won’t protect us from the very things about religion we found most harmful. And that hurts.
But I do want to have a look at the actual text on the website—fact checking and responding here and there—before I close this post. So, let’s take a look.
Women today are being taught to act more like men. Where has that led us? Skyrocketing rates of divorce, depression, dysfunction, and America at the #1 spot in the world for single motherhood.
Not to be pedantic, but I checked, and we’re actually not #1.
No longer will you have to give in to toxic bullying feminist dogma and go against your ancient, biological nature as a woman.
What, that toxic feminist dogma of “be what you want to be”? If women are in fact biologically wired to want to be at home, and to obey their husbands, feminism isn’t going to change that. Besides, in that case, why would there even be feminists to begin with?
Feminism: Women should have options and be able to make their own choices about their lives. These guys: Women are wired to want to stay home with their kids, giving them options is damaging and dangerous! Okay, cool, that makes sense. Except not. Not at all.
EXPERIENCE a miraculous three day (and night) event with iconic speakers gathered from the worldwide manosphere community to dramatically improve your life and femininity.
Brought together to create positive media for women, make women great again, and to help supercharge your personal growth on the path to becoming your very own ideal woman.
With all these references to the manosphere and becoming an “ideal woman” what this really sounds like is some sort of bizarre attempt to groom brides for “incel” communities.
I’ve read all the hot takes and listened to all the podcasts. There’s an argument out there that men’s insecurities and fears need to be taken more seriously than they currently are by feminists. The claim is that dismissing conversations at the whiff of the men’s rights type rhetoric, and mocking men, actually drives men into the manosphere, while taking these men’s concerns more seriously and addressing them might staunch the flow in that direction.
Regardless of how far we should take this argument—and it’s worth a full post of its own, because I do have questions—the argument that no one, including men, should be mocked for being virgins, or for their physical appearance, makes complete sense to me. In other words, I’m not down for calling people “neckbeards” or “incels.” I don’t think that’s helpful.
But while the manosphere is quick to become angry when a feminist uses a word like “neckbeard,” they’re actually quite happy to dish back the same in reverse. In other words, they don’t appear to have any actual qualms about going after people’s appearances.
Ha! Ha! It’s an ugly angry feminist! And it’s not just here. It gets worse. Whoever’s running this event is all about focusing on women’s appearances. There is no place for unattractive women (by whatever standard we’re judging that) in their world.
BEAUTY AND THE OBESITY
What exactly is “the obesity”? I mean, really? “The”?
Over 80 million women in America today are overweight or obese.
The number of American women who are overweight or obese is actually slightly lower than the figure given above. More importantly, though, the number of American men who are overweight or obese is actually somewhat higher than the number of American women who are overweight or obese. Interestingly, that is not mentioned.
These epidemic level numbers are no secret in spite of endless hyper-fit photoshop pictures of Instagram celebrities at ridiculously low body fat levels.
We catch it at both sides, cool cool cool.
Nevertheless, being sick and obese (a recognized disease in modern medicine) is not beautiful. Taking good care of your body is beautiful in process and outcome. Men admire healthy, fit women. They are after all sizing you up for reproduction, and your decisions will be passed on to your children through the choices you make via epigenetics.
Ah yes, there it is. Men are “sizing you up for reproduction.” My dudes. There’s a reason so many women actually like what feminists have to say. See, we’d rather be viewed as people than as brood mares.
At The 22 Convention, you’ll learn how women have been lied to about “body positivity” and how you can embrace #beautypositivity right away!
Whoever put this convention together doesn’t appear to really know what “body positivity” is, because a piece of it is that when you feel happy and confident in your body, whatever its shape or size, that shines through. That that is beauty. But then, the “manosphere” seems to have very traditional—and narrow—ideas about what beauty is.
RAISE YOUR FEMININITY BY 500%
That’s an oddly precise number.
For the past several hundred thousand years of human life on this planet, masculine men have preferred feminine women in all areas of life; from the kitchen to the bedroom, dating to relationships, marriage, family, and beyond.
Can we have a definition of “feminine women”? I mean, what does that actually mean, exactly? Here’s what I’m guessing it means: submissive, quiet, obedient, self-effacing, always adoring and praising the male presence in her life, deferential, etc., because that’s basically what it means in funny Christian circles. Some specifics would be nice—if they’re actually expecting women to sign up for this, they should have the opportunity to know what they’re getting into.
Also, this conference costs $2,000, and I’m just going to go right out there and say that a copy of Debi Pearl’s Created to be His Help Meet is a lot cheaper than that.
High quality masculine men want high quality feminine women to mother their children and set great examples for their daughters. Our speakers will teach you what men and women of prior generations FAILED to teach you as a direct result of feminist meddling and sabotage. These are the relationship and life talks radical feminists do not want you to hear.
But you can’t hear them unless you sign up!
GET PREGNANT AND HAVE UNLIMITED BABIES!
I mean good god, there’s not even an “if you want to” qualification here. Do the men putting this conference together know that not every woman wants to be pregnant and have “unlimited” babies? Like seriously, I read “have unlimited babies” and I want to run away screaming—and I am a mom!
For decades, feminism has derided women who want to prioritize motherhood and family. Shamed them, mocked them, ridiculed them as servants of some mysterious patriarchy boogeyman.
Um … also no.
In the 1970s, there was this fascinating feminist campaign to give housewives more guaranteed access to social security in retirement, largely to ensure that middle and upper class women who spent their lives raising children only to be divorced in favor of a younger woman would have access to social security under the argument that her domestic work had helped augment her husband’s wages and career over the most productive years of his career.
And that’s just one example. Feminists want to see paid maternity leave, so that women can prioritize both children and a career, and they also tend to support efforts to help women reenter the workforce after staying at home while their children are young.
I’m a feminist and a mother of two. I prioritize my children and my family a lot, and I’ve never been shamed, mocked, or ridiculed in feminist circles, so, again, no.
These clever manipulations were designed to weed you out of the gene pool and forever prevent you from embracing the sacred responsibility, honor, and adventure of motherhood – a journey your half of the human race is uniquely equipped for.
Having ovaries does not make a person “uniquely equipped” for parenthood. It makes an individual uniquely equipped to create a human (although I’d point out that a man is equally as necessary), not uniquely equipped to raise one. Also, if parenting is so very fun, why aren’t men interested in being just as involved in it?
See, this is the doublespeak. What these men want is women who stay at home and raise large numbers of children while freeing their husbands to go out into the world and do what they damn well please. Childrearing is women’s work. That is why they go on and on about it being a “sacred responsibility”—to confuse women from the fact that they don’t want to do it.
Feminism encourages men to be equally and involved parents, but these men don’t want that. They may praise the beauty and wonder of motherhood, but the truth is that they just don’t want to change the dirty diapers. They want you to. But it’s beautiful, they swear!
Our speakers will teach you how to have as many babies as your heart desires with the time you have left and bounce back to amazing health and wellness without extreme diets or stress. The clock is ticking and your babies are soon to be kicking!
What. The. Heck. Notice the emphasis on being able to “bounce back.” And sure, they say “to amazing health and wellness,” but the reference to extreme diets make it clear that they actually mean thinness and conventional beauty, to make sure you’re still attractive to the man you’re attached to. (Guess what? My pregnancies left me with an incurable health condition! Get pregnant now and you can spin the wheel and get one too! Fun! Chance! Adventure!)
Oh, and then there’s this:
BEAT THE COMPETITION – BECOME THE ULTIMATE WIFE
First of all, I don’t see other women as my “competition,” and second, becoming “the ultimate wife” is actually not my goal.
How many of your friends are stuck in the notorious “f**k buddy” zone? Endlessly riding a roller coaster of heartbreak, betrayal, and despair? Most women say they want to “get married” but how many truly want to become the best wives ever for their husbands and themselves?
Is it just me, or does it sound like they’re suggesting that some women end up with live-in boyfriends who don’t want to get married because these women aren’t focused enough on becoming good wife material? On reread, yes, that’s exactly what they’re suggesting.
So that’s fun!
Learn the secrets of becoming the ultimate “wife material” in today’s hyper-competitive, dystopian, sexual marketplace of Photoshop, camera angles, and cheap sugar baby sexuality.
Jesus, maybe they should just try telling men that most women don’t actually look like models and that pictures of models are actually photoshopped. Is it just me, or would that be easier?
Learn the truth about submission, dominance, and functional, healthy relationships that respect your nature as a woman.
Ha! I told you this was all about submission!
Oh and hey, this picture is on the event website:
What do you know! That’s an image created by Lori Alexander, a fundamentalist patriarchal blogger with whom my regular readers will be quite familiar! And once again, it confirms that this is all about dominance and submission. If you look at the speakers list, you will see that many of them describe themselves ass “patriarchs,” and one even promises to teach you the BDSM lifestyle ass your ticket to perfect sex! He has a 24/7 D/s relationship with his wife, see—something they somehow discovered through “a Christian women’s site about submission.”
And that’s the end of the text on their website! Don’t you want to sign up now? Sign up today and you, too, can be conventionally attractive, the ultimate wife to a dominant man who will make all your decisions for him, and constantly pregnant with his unlimited babies!
For the low, low price of $2,000!*
* hotel rooms and meals not included.
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