Quoting Quiverfull – Lori Alexander Modesty Police?

Quoting Quiverfull – Lori Alexander Modesty Police? June 19, 2017

quotingquiverfullby Lori Alexander on Facebook and on Things Godly Women Say – Spanking Thongs

Editor’s note: You may notice it’s been a few days since there was a posting. I am right in the middle of my international move to Costa Rica and have driving down to the New Orleans area to visit relatives and ship my car from the port of New Orleans. Postings may be spotty and not as frequently until after I get settled. I fly out on the 23rd and  none of my elderly relatives here in South Louisiana have wifi, or any internet. I’ve haven’t forgotten you or this place, I’m just in transition.

And while that transition started happening I noticed the Lori is busy saying oh so many mucho ridiculous things aplenty! Like this Facebook posting screen capped by TGWS Tumblr. Lori needs to rethink this idea of spanking those thonged maidens lazing on the beach in San Diego. Not only because it would be a crime to assault all those strangers on the beach, but Lori herself could end up being the one injured. Whose to say at least one of those lovely ladies will not hand down a walloping to Lori for the paddling, or which of them might have a switchblade or gun in their bag? Risky business. Part of me hopes that Lori follows through on her threats just so she would have to bear the consequences of her hateful theology.

“Ken and I walked along the beach late afternoon and almost every young woman was wearing a thong. I told him next time I’m going to bring a paddle and paddle their bottoms! Ken told me it would look great if I were to be arrested for spanking women in thongs on the beach!”

So a criminal record is a desired thing? Harming others because you have your own quirks is okay? Where did Jesus say that someone else violating your personal dress code could be punished with physical abuse. Make no mistake about it, this is ABUSE.

QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders, cultural enforcers and those that seek to keep women submitted to men and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull and Spiritual Abuse honestly and thoughtfully.

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Sarah Anne

    One has to wonder if Ken would actually LOVE to see his wife paddling scantily clad women. I think it’s funny she (apparently) didn’t realize how sexual that sounds.

  • AuntKaylea

    I was thinking more along the lines of Ms. Alexander getting a face full of pepper spray, myself. . .

    And Suzanne, our thoughts and prayers are with you during the move.

  • Nightshade

    Kinky Lori (and Ken), whoda thunkit?

    Sure, Aunt Lori, go ahead and smack a random woman’s butt just because you don’t like what she’s wearing, get yourself arrested for assault and see if anyone pays your bail.

  • Tawreos

    She just needs to make the right kind of friend so she can smack a woman on the ass whenever she wants to instead of threatening to harm strangers.

    So much pain in this world could be spared if people like her were able to admit they are attracted to the same sex.

  • The Jack of Sandwich

    Now I can’t get the Thong Song out of my head.

    I would love to see her try to defend herself from assault charges after trying something like this.

  • Jezebel’sOlderSister

    Paddling ladies in thongs? Sounds like Sharia law.

  • Rachel

    I don’t think Lori realizes that she’d probably be more likely to be charged with sexual assault than physical.

    And where is the talk of paddling shirtless men in Speedos? Once again demonstrating that this culture thinks that women have no sex drive (or at least shouldn’t).

    ETA: Also, wishing you as smooth a transition as possible!

  • katiehippie

    Ahhhhhhh, she can’t spell raisins? Excuse me while I go twitch a bit.

  • Suzanne Harper Titkemeyer


  • Nea

    …Ken really thinks that it would be “look great” if his wife was hauled off on multiple counts of assult and battery? He really does hate her, doesn’t he?

  • Nea

    Not just assault, assault and battery. Potentially “with a deadly weapon” considering what she might be using for a paddle.

    The other part of the law little ms. High and Mighty doesn’t realize is that the second she makes the swing anything, absolutely anything, that the women do back to her is legal self-defense/defense of others.

  • pinkie

    Speaking of modesty, I got an article through Facebook that said (more or less) “Your worth as a person isn’t dependent on what you wear, therefore you are worthless if you don’t dress modestly.” Olympic-level doublespeak going on.

  • So she was calling her husband’s attention to immodestly dressed women so he would have to battle sinful urges? I mean, if dressing immodestly is a stumbling block to men, then isn’t pointing out the immodestly dressed women in case he missed them also a stumbling block? And as others have pointing out, adding the mental picture of those scantily clad women being spanked?

    You might almost think she wants her husband to go to hell.

  • pagankitty

    … so Ken and Lori have a spanking fetish?? That makes me even more uncomfortable with their child rearing methods.

  • SAO

    I’ve done quite a few international moves. My advice — unless you have your residency permits in your passports and international driver’s licenses, bring all your vital documents carry-on. If they lock the container with your stuff, be sure to get the key. If they lock it and promise the key will be at the other end, locate a hacksaw or locksmith before the truck arrives (seriously, do this), so if the truck arrives locked and the driver doesn’t have a key, you can solve the problem quickly. Don’t expect the truck to be on time. Getting stuck in customs is the norm. For us, cars have always taken a week to months longer to arrive. For the car, have copies of your registration, and hopefully, the purchase document on you. Save all the import paperwork in case you ever want to take it back to the States. Give your cell phone number to everyone involved in the move, including the truck driver.

    On our last night in England, 2 days after the truck had left with our goods, my husband was faxing various car documents to Customs because 1) the truck driver did not have everything Customs asked for, despite us using an international mover with a good reputation who got all the paperwork they said they needed before the move and 2) the mover’s office was closed for the weekend and 3) the movers’ driver did not speak much English. He did call my husband from Customs, so Customs could ask for the purchase and sale documents. I think the real hold-up was moving a valuable commodity out of England on a truck with a European license plate by a truck driver who was obviously from somewhere else. Customs thought it looked dodgy.

  • HairyEyedWordBombThrower

    She’s all about the humiliation. She’s internalized the xtian humiliation she suffers, and now demands EVERYBODY ELSE suffer as well.

    Consent? Well, that’s not an xtian virtue.

  • lady_black

    Hit ME on the bottom with a paddle, and I’ll break it over your goddamned head. She better re-think that.

  • lady_black

    I think that would be great, but I can’t stand her. Her husband is supposed to LIKE her.

  • lady_black

    What about men wearing things?

  • lady_black

    Yep. And I would definitely do absolutely anything to someone who dared to strike me.

  • Jezebel’sOlderSister

    I don’t know — it depends on thing they’re wearing (paddling should be required for speedos on less than perfect bodies).

  • lady_black

    NOBODY should wear Speedos. That’s my motto. But I go to a nice gay beach, and I have seen men wearing thongs. I always laugh at them behind their backs. But I have seen them.

  • Wade

    Those girls in thongs could probably beat her ass silly – and Ken’s too. Hey, self defense against some random, violent weirdos.

  • gimpi1

    Mrs. Alexander should probably familiarize herself with the laws concerning assault and battery, possibly also the laws regarding sexual assault. (I’m pretty sure “paddling” women wearing beachwear on a beach could be considered a sexual assault.) She should also retain a lawyer. Or, here’s a thought, she could just mind her own business? is that possible? Naah, she can’t possibly be expected to let other people make their own choices… how foolish of me to consider that.

    An aside; best of luck on your move, Suzanne. I look forward to hearing about gardening in Costa Rica.

  • gimpi1

    I thought of that, too. Mrs. Alexander, charged with sexually assaulting a bunch of women… that would be an interesting court-case.

  • gimpi1

    And you would be legally justified – defending yourself against an assault.

  • Nightshade

    Doesn’t realize, or thinks ‘God’s not gonna let them hit back, ’cause these filthy hussies are upsetting me, and of course what upsets me upsets God!’

  • bekabot

    Ken and I walked along the beach late afternoon and almost every young woman was wearing a thong.

    Correction: almost every young woman Lori noticed was wearing a thong — and those were the ones she wanted to paddle. She didn’t notice or want to do anything in particular to any of the others. I have no doubt the beach was littered with non-thong-wearing women of various ages, all of whom Lori ignored, to the extent of not noticing they were there.

    (‘Splained it.)

  • And, you know, it is a beach. People tend not to wear ski parkas there. What did she expect to see, 1890’s bathing dresses complete with long black stockings?

  • Rachel

    Er, what? Was there a thought process behind that or were they just using buzzwords so they could pretend to be “progressive” and “feminist”?

  • Rachel

    I do wonder how she defines thong though, because I’ve only seen one woman wearing an actual thong at the beach in the US in my life. Or maybe I’m going to the wrong beaches.

    Thong bikinis were only slightly more popular on the Caribbean coast of Colombia. In 6 months I saw maybe 2. I really want to know where all of these thong-wearing beach-goers are.

  • bekabot

    So far as Lori’s concerned, the world’s a movie in her head, and I think she expected to see something like this, except that all those other people kept getting in the way.

    (Ken seems to have developed the knack of humoring her. Wise man.)

  • bekabot

    They’re not on Long Beach, that’s for sure. People who hang out there dress like they’re on a Polar expedition.

  • AFo

    I did a double take when I read that. Lori seems unable to comprehend that just because a woman is not part of the evangelical cult, doesn’t mean she automatically wears thongs to the beach.

  • AFo

    This is only a problem for the Loris of the world. The rest of us can see women on a beach wearing a thong and not let it affect the rest of our day. But not Lori, because dammit, those women are being immodest and not submitting to their husbands and are ACTUALLY OUTSIDE THE HOME, enjoying life, and she just can’t have that.

  • Melody

    So now we know what her husband likes to see….. real life porn with his wife as dom and scantily clad thong-wearing women getting spanked.

  • Jo

    She should come to Australia, we all wear thongs in summer — on our feet.

  • bekabot

    Well, sure. In Lori’s world there are two kinds of women — the holy kind (including her) and the rest. Since all the other women (the ones who aren’t her) are unholy, there are no limits to what they might do. They’ll eat their unborn babies and fcvxr gurve jvar jvgu zrafgehny syhvq…they might even go so far as to vote for Hillary Clinton. Among other things, they’ll wear thongs to the beach. (“What part of ‘no decency’ do you not understand, worldlings?”)

  • pinkie

    It seemed to be genuinely urging people to be modest…but there didn’t seem to be much of a thought process behind it. Other than “you should dress how I want.”

    And “what you wear won’t fix your issues, so you should fix your issues by dressing modestly.”

  • Stephanie Rice

    I don’t particularly like it when men wear speedos. But you know what I do? I ignore it and go about my business because I’m NOT a petulant child.

  • Anonyme
  • Rachel

    Because that makes total sense…

  • They do seem to be into some serious kink!

  • mashava

    More likely, suit bottoms were riding up a little, exposing some cheek. It’s a common problem once you start moving! (It’s why I personally refuse to leave the beach/poolside without pulling shorts on first. Also wet thighs chafing.)

    But I would imagine anything that showed even the barest insinuation of the difference between thigh & bum is a “thong” to Lori.

  • mashava

    That’s what my grandma always meant when she said thongs. My brother and I tried very hard to get her not to say that

  • Nancy

    Before we were married my husband went to Wal-mart asking where the thongs were and got a funny look from the clerk before she directed him to the underwear section. He also meant the kind to wear on your feet…..lol. We have a good laugh on this from time to time.

  • Emersonian

    That was my immediate reaction–the suggestion of spanking/paddling an adult seems so overtly kinky to me I’m baffled that even someone as repressed as Lori Alexander wouldn’t be aware of the implications here.

  • Joy

    1. Is she serious or joking?

    2. Maybe Ken thinks it would look great because he would get off on it…

    Edit: Apparently I’m not the only who is wondering about my second question!

  • Jennny

    It does, but it’s christian sharia so that’s OK, unlike catholic sharia or islamic sharia law which aren’t.

  • Jennny

    I live by a beach where bathing machines were in use, in the UK. If you like victoriana, there are some wonderful google images of them and women in cover-all beachwear back then. There’s nothing to stop Lori dressing like that for swimming, it’s a free country, however much she would like to impose her weird sharia law!

  • Nea

    They learned at Pearl’s knee, and he has a massive spanking fetish.

  • Anri

    There are exactly two people obsessing over bare flesh in Lori’s story.

    Spoiler: not the people (at least semi-) comfortably walking around in beachwear.

  • Nightshade
  • The Jack of Sandwich

    And then the police show up….
    I think I’ve seen this one.

  • Annerdr

    I suspect sarcasm.

  • Ruthitchka

    I had to unlearn “thongs” and learn “flip flops” as an adult, when the meaning abruptly changed!

  • Evelyn

    Stop looking at their bottoms. They are not wearing thongs *at* you.

  • Evelyn

    But that suspicious kind of sarcasm, where you wonder if it isn’t really sarcastic at all, at the root of it.

  • IM

    I have to do this now.

    Let me see that thonnngggggggg!

    But on a serious note, Lori seems to have a lot of repressed sexuality. Does she want Ken to spank her, or does she like spanking other people? Either way, the woman seems a bit envious of the bodies and freedom of other women.

  • Hannah

    Off topic, but woah! Those islands look amazing! Almost prehistoric, I can imagine pterodactyls circling around them.

  • bekabot

    Those islands look amazing!

    They are amazing. About the pterodactyls: many people have pointed out that there’s a Land-of-the-Dinosaurs vibe to much of the Pacific Northwest, starting out with northern California redwoods and so on up the coast. But my instinct is to say that if you wanna see it in person, it would be a good idea to hurry up, because everything’s disappearing behind a range or hedge of condominiums.