This letter is another one of those problems that oh so rarely occur with people outside of cult isolation. Usually people get plenty of time to learn how to deal with crushes, interacting with a former curse and how to navigate gracefully those awkward situations.

Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical, rational and the best possible solution, in other words 180 degree turn from Debi and friends answers. As always all spelling and grammar in the posting is unchanged from the original author.

What to do in an akward situation?

So I am in Bible College and I met a great guy. I was not sure whether I really liked him or not(still am not sure) so I started observing him. He really seems to love God and wants to serve him and that is what really attracted me to him was seeing him involved in different ministries and his heart for God. For a about a month and a half he seemed to be showing an interest in me until he noticed that I was watching him. Then he asked someone to tell me that he was not interested in a relationship with anyone at this point in time. That is fine with me. I was avised to ignore him for the next while which I have done. But now it is very akward whenever we are together. I don’t want to be mean but sometimes I feel I am being rude by ignoring him which is very hard to do as I am attracted to him. I am still trying to be nice without giving him any ideas. How can I still be a friend? And should I allow myself to be interested in him? It still may be a possibility in the future but right now is just not the right timing. He is a perfectionist who wants to have everything in order before he gets married. I don’t want to scare him off.

The answers this young woman got in the comments were to avoid him, be nice and pray for him. One lady pointed out that she might have been warned off of him by someone with ulterior motives. What do you think?

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