There are few things in life that are certain. Death, taxes, you’ll get hungry if you don’t eat and it rains during rainy season. Not that many exciting things that happen routinely. But how you accept and deal with those things is purely up to you. There’s no right way, or right emotions when you’re talking about the day to day. Everyone is different.
But in Quiverfull there are a few other things that you can count on. Doug Wilson using big words badly on his blog. Tim Bayly throwing a cyber snit-fit over guys that do not fit his idea of masculinity. The Pearls advocating child abuse and poisonous marriage counseling. Larry Solomon describing the Biblical role of women as a cooking sex doll. Lori Alexander posting ideas complete devoid of compassion, love or mercy. Someone moving the modesty standard. Female cultural enforcers grappling to be top of the heap while spreading fear and telling you what to do.
The other completely predictable happening in Quiverfull is Above Rubies Nancy Campbell ordering everyone to be joyful without reason and smile, smile, smile. Nancy advocated this very thing twice in one week. First in her post ‘Marriage Secret’ and later in the week in ‘Sour Grapes or Sweet’?
I am sorry to inflict this screen grab on you with a photo of Nancy and Colin making facial expressions at each other like the howler monkey that lives behind my house does when he’s hanging around. Do they look really happy or just really fakely bizarre to you?
Sorry, but a frowning or plain faced mother is not going to create grumpy children. Mandatory fake happiness of expression sounds much more miserable way to live than being authentic, experiencing your own emotions, and never showing your true emotions. It’s not even Biblical!
Whenever I read words from female cultural enforcers demanding you hide your emotions and smile I think of these words from the New Testament – “Jesus wept” John 11:35. When you read the story of Mary and Martha mourning for their deceased brother and Jesus joining in you notice that these are “Happy Happy Joy Joy” moments and no one is bothering to smile. They’re showing genuine human emotions. Unlike Nancy Campbell and her followers.
In another ‘Daily Encouragement’ with the title ‘Stir Up The Pot’ Nancy goes so far as to insist you confront people who are liars or unbelievers and says you must smile while you confront liars. Again, not always appropriate. I’d think it might be better to just smile and not confront people on their foibles.
In the last little bit Nancy simply rewrites her first piece on smiling by comparing women to grapes, sour grapes, sweet grapes before going into a ramble about vineyards in Israel making some of the sweetest wine.
Nancy seems to know about as much about growing grapes and the conditions that make grapes turn sour as she does about the real world of women in 2017.
It’s not healthy for anyone to fake a smile and suppress any of your emotions. If you repress it’s bound to pop out somewhere and wreak havoc. Better to acknowledge your feelings and deal with them as they happen.
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