Submission or Abuse?

Submission or Abuse? November 3, 2019

This one popped up today on my radar. A lady I’ve not seen before that runs a Facebook page Submissive Wife said this about her husband’s reaction to her completely natural and normal questions.

No, you’re teaching your daughter that her needs and wants do not matter if you trust your husband to remember every little thing. There’s nothing wrong with double checking to make sure someone else hasn’t forgotten something important, like gloves and a hat. This has nothing to do with submission and everything to do with abusive control.

In a marriage partnership, and make no mistake marriage is always a partnership no matter what they claim, there will be times you will need to gently remind each other. My husband always asks me about things like that, and I do it to him too. There’s no disrespect, no attempt to usurp any sort of authority, just two flawed humans reminding each other to add to the grocery list, or remember to hit the hardware store. Helping each other.

All this guy had to do was say, “Yes I have those gloves and hat” or “No, but I’ll pack them now” the very first time his wife asked the question instead of turning it into an abusive moment.

This lady also believes in Christian Domestic Discipline – CDD. She’s posted  before about her husband tossing her over his knee and spanking her.

BDSM is fine if you are both in agreement, but linking it to some sort of punishment is just all kinds of wrong. There has to be mutual consent, not one person physically lording it over another person. Punishment without mutual consent is assault.

How does any of this glorify God or Jesus or anything to do with Christianity? One of the saddest things about her Facebook page is that there are good things, beautiful ideas posted without this level of abuse and control.

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About Suzanne Titkemeyer
Suzanne Titkemeyer went from a childhood in Louisiana to a life lived in the shadow of Washington D.C. For many years she worked in the field of social work, from national licensure to working hands on in a children's residential treatment center. Suzanne has been involved with helping the plights of women and children' in religious bondage. She is a ordained Stephen's Minister with many years of counseling experience. Now she's retired to be a full time beach bum in Tamarindo, Costa Rica with the monkeys and iguanas. She is also a thalassophile. She also left behind years in a Quiverfull church and loves to chronicle the worst abuses of that particular theology. She has been happily married to her best friend for the last 33 years. You can read more about the author here.

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