5 Ways to Cope When Your Partner Has an Anxiety Disorder

Last updated on: December 19, 2021 at 8:56 pm By Terry Gaspard

According to the American Psychiatric Association, anxiety disorders affect about 30% of adults in the US during their lifetime, making them the most common mental health disorder. Typically, anxiety is defined as a feeling of worry, panic, or fear that can manifest itself in physical symptoms such as trembling, breathlessness, sweating, numbness, or having hot and cold flashes. When someone is experiencing a panic attack, they may also feel like they can’t breathe and that they are going to... Read more

Why Can’t I Be Friends with My Ex After My Divorce?

Last updated on: December 12, 2021 at 2:22 pm By Terry Gaspard

There are many reasons why people strive to be friends with their ex after a breakup or divorce. Certainly one of the main reasons is that they have unfinished business that they hope to resolve. Our they may want to keep the non-intimate part of the relationship going because they have caring feelings toward their former spouse. Finally, some people feel guilty about leaving the relationship. However, the reality is that it’s usually problematic for ex-spouses to maintain a friendship... Read more

Tuning Into Your Partner: 3 Steps To Foster Improved Communication and Understanding

Last updated on: May 15, 2022 at 7:21 pm By Terry Gaspard

During a recent couples counseling session, Tim, 38, spoke about how overwhelmed he feels when Samantha, 37, get upset with him and shares her frustrations. According to Samantha, he tunes her out and often retreats to another room or watches sports. Tim reflects: “I love Sam and want to make her happy but when she bombards me with intense feelings, it’s more than I can handle so I usually bail out. I do feel badly and we sometimes talk later,... Read more

How to Overcome Mistrust and Fear of Abandonment

Last updated on: November 25, 2021 at 9:47 pm By Terry Gaspard

During our counseling session, Kayla, 35, reflected on her trust issues with her boyfriend, Tim, 38, who loves her deeply but is growing tired of her suspicious comments and can’t seem to reassure her enough. Kayla put it like this is: “I know Tim loves me but I’m always worried that the other shoe is going drop and he’ll leave me like my father did when I was ten. There was nothing I could do to stop him and he... Read more

How Couples Can Effectively Communicate Their Emotions

Last updated on: November 20, 2021 at 4:32 pm By Terry Gaspard

Think about it: when you’re in a good mood, you might give your partner the benefit of the doubt. It’s easy to show generosity when they make a mistake, even granting them forgiveness more readily. Let’s face it, our moods greatly affect our communication. If you are in a bad mood, you are more likely to perceive what our partner says negatively. This point is illustrated by Laura’s bad day and her negative interaction with Ron when she returns home... Read more

How to Build Trust and Intimacy in a Second Marriage

Last updated on: November 13, 2021 at 4:01 pm By Terry Gaspard

During our couples counseling session, Alyssa, 53, spoke about the betrayal of her first husband that ended her divorce and the lingering effects of infidelity. Even though her second husband, Ethan, 57, has not given her reasons to lose faith in him, she finds herself being jealous and suspicious of his actions. Alyssa put it like this: “When Ethan doesn’t return my text or phone call right away, I track his location and automatically think the worst – that he’s... Read more

6 Smart Ways To Deal With Jealous Feelings

Last updated on: November 7, 2021 at 9:39 am By Terry Gaspard

One of my clients, Carolyn, a 35 year old accountant, has difficulty trusting Bob, 38, because her parents’ marriage ended due to infidelity and broken promises. She started dating Bob after a brief courtship and often reacts with fear and suspicion when he gets home a little late or there’s even the slightest inconsistency in his story. If he receives a text or phone message from a female co-worker, she finds that jealousy rears its ugly head and she usually... Read more

Don’t Let Money Problems Ruin Your Marriage

Last updated on: November 2, 2021 at 9:28 am By Terry Gaspard

During a recent counseling session, Karen and Joshua, in their late thirties, spoke about their finances, and explained how their debt was causing stress in their relationship. Since they are both self-employed and were paid sporadically, it was easy for debt to build up and most of their discussions about money turned into arguments over the past few years. Married for over a decade and raising two children, they had drifted apart and the last thing they wanted to talk... Read more

How to Avoid a Power Struggle with Your Partner

Last updated on: October 20, 2021 at 5:14 pm By Terry Gaspard

During a counseling session with Teresa, 46, and Jeff, 49, they described a negative pattern of relating that usually starts with Teresa demanding Jeff finish projects around their home or plan a vacation with her. In both cases, he feels pressured because he owns his own business and has difficulty taking time off from work. Teresa put it like this: “I try to be patient but it feels like our home and family life always come last since Jeff works... Read more

The Keys to Being an Emotionally Available Partner

Last updated on: November 2, 2021 at 9:26 am By Terry Gaspard

During a recent couples counseling session, Kylie, 36, spoke about her frustration with her husband, Tim, 35, who she feels distances himself emotionally and doesn’t show empathy when she’s upset very often. They’ve been married three years and she’s concerned that if she doesn’t feel closer to him, it will cause them to split up because she feels lonely in their marriage. Kylie reflects: “Tim is a good husband in many ways but he tends to go into a shell... Read more