How Do You Deal With Hurt Feelings?

I’m always advocating for love, peace, and understanding between people but it’s difficult. It’s hard enough to be kind towards people you dislike, but there are times when you feel hurt or dismissed by the people you love.

I wonder how we are meant to deal with the minor personal conflicts that grate on us. I wonder why it seems to be impossible to be close to people without accidentally hurting one another sometimes.

This question isn’t brought up by anything with my husband. He’s perfect! But there was a situation where a bunch of my friends got together for a party that I wasn’t invited to. Now, if that were all there was to it I would understand why I feel upset. But the truth is that it was a party in honor of a person who doesn’t seem to like me so it’s not that surprising that I didn’t get an invite. Yet it still hurts.

Why is that?

I think, self esteem being as fragile as it is, the scenario makes me start questioning whether any of my friends like me and enjoy spending time with me. That’s a dumb thing to question since there’s plenty of evidence that most of them do. But it brings up some old insecurities. It reminds me of things I don’t like about myself and that I assume other people are frustrated by about me (things like my impulsiveness).

I feel like ideally my response as a Hindu should be to recognize that it is my ego that is feeling bruised and that’s not the true me.

I should be gracious and kind to people while not expecting anything in return. I should be happy when I am invited and indifferent when I’m not.

Easier said than done!