Having Expectations in Marriage is Bad?

Having Expectations in Marriage is Bad? July 6, 2018

In a sleeveless shirt breaking all of the Godly women dictums today…..

Another day ending with β€˜day’ and it’s anotherΒ  bout of The Transformed Wife’s Lori Alexander blathering on and on about what she thinks matters in marriages. Today in a piece titled β€˜The Feminist Additions to Titus 2’ is pretty standard. It’s Lori-theology, not actual theology, with its exhortations to submit, submit, and submit with zero expectations. She goes to to say later than having expectations in marriage is bad. Well at least any expectations of how your husband will treat you.

But, what a minute, we all have expectations, At least very basic ones when we come into marriage, the expectation that our partner will not abuse us. that we’ll love one another, that the love between us will be enough to make it work. To get through those tough times together. Is it really bad to have expectations going into marriage? Not necessarily.

Being obedient to your busband and having the expectation that he will not abuse you, treat you with kindness and love is not a mutually exclusive thing. It’s not a sin to insist that someone else treat you with basic respect in the most intimate relationship of your life.

This is not to say that people cannot carry wrong expectations into their marriages. People do it all the time. But not about expectation of how their partner will treat them. Usually it concerns things like spending money, lifestyle, or thinking that they will change their partners. Don’t do that. It’s just an exercise in frustration for everyone involved.

For a religion supposedly built on the lovingkindness of God there’s a great deal practiced in Evangelical Quiverfull that has more to do with hate.


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