National Spank Out Day

I felt so lost when I first decided not to spank. It seemed like there were just no resources for parents like me. After almost 2 years, I am continually surprised by the sheer amount of great information on why spanking is damaging, and tons of great resources on gentle parenting. The links to articles and websites that I have saved in my favorites continues to grow, and I am seriously considering starting a new resource page on my blog where I can continue to link information as I find it for anyone looking for that type of thing.

Today is National Spank Out day, and I don’t have a post of my own ready. So instead I am sharing a few of the posts I’ve written in the past, as well as some awesome posts I’ve seen around the Internet lately.

This is one of the first posts I wrote on spanking, and it still makes me emotional when I remember my daughters face as I told her we did not spank anymore.

This is a great summary on why and how spanking is damaging.

This is my recent post on why children deserve as much respect as adults.

A thought provoking post on the results of spanking.

Be sure to check some of them out. And feel free to share any of your recent discoveries in the comments!

I still believe that choosing to stop spanking my children changed my life and my children’s lives for the better, I would never go back. I’ve gone from using only spanking, to using mostly time-outs and insisting that spanking had to be preserved for life-threatening disobedience, to realizing that spankings are unnecessary and even “chill-out” times are becoming increasingly rare. My children are just as well behaved or better behaved than before, and I am a much calmer, happier parent. Do I ever have bad days where nothing seems to be going right and I have to fight my lifetime of training to hit my children? Yes. But those helpless feelings happen less and less often, and I am finally confident that I am doing the right thing.

You can read more about my journey by clicking the Discipline label on the side of my blog.

  • teresa

    Wow, you're brilliant. I applaud you for being so thoughtful about this whole thing. I look forward to reading through some of your older posts.

  • Zoie @ TouchstoneZ

    Thank you for sharing these for Spank Out Day. I'm looking forward to reading your posts.

    I'm holding a link up for Spank Out Day Posts. Is it okay if I add your to the list? It's here:

  • Young Mom

    Feel free to link, thanks so much!

  • Zoie @ TouchstoneZ

    Wonderful. Adding you now :)

  • Kelly Hogaboom

    Thank you for this piece! I participated in Spank Out Day (thanks to Zoie) and it has been a wonderful experience.

  • Kelly

    Love the honesty and resources you are sharing here – your post about the 'mean mommy' was so touching. I am looking forward to getting to know your blog! :)

  • Jennifer

    Thank you for sharing this. Here are a couple of sites I have found to be helpful in my journey from punitive to gentle parenting:

  • Pippi

    I do have a question about the life-threatening thing. I used to roll me eyes when my mom told me I needed to spank the boys more for their own safety, but the reason I quit working is that they had become totally out of control. And I really didn't know what to do when my four-year-old ran across the road twice without looking, ignoring our warnings; ran away to the pond across a busy parking lot; and I still don't know what to do when he runs headlong into a parking lot every time I take him somewhere. He is too big for me to physically control, and when big brother joins in and tries to defend his behaviour it becomes really unbearable. I'm hoping over time they will both calm down. But I'm worried in the meantime. And then the six-year-old throws tantrums where he actively tries to break our things or damage property when he doesn't get what he wants. I've gotten the spatula back out for those "life-threatening" and trying to break things situations, and frankly I am beginning to think that I simply have to have a transition period. I cannot take both of them anywhere with me right now, which presents a major problem. They are getting calmer though, and I've only been home for two weeks. So here's hoping.

  • Young Mom

    Pippi- It sounds like a difficult situation, and I can't pretend to have all the answers. It sounds as though there is alot of change going on in their lives, so maybe some of the uncertainty is effecting them. Here is an article that I found helpful, I'm hoping to write on parenting in public soon. I'm sure there are places you could post about your dilemma and ask for suggestions on how to deal with it. Gentle Christian Mothers,and the facebook group "Peaceful Parenting" could be a good place to ask for feedback.

  • Pippi

    Thankyou Young Mom!