October 23, 2018

I didn’t grow up in the Catholic church, so I’m not sure how big of an impact someone like Joshua Harris had on Catholic teenagers. I do know he had a huge impact within the evangelical world. I was sixteen when I Kissed Dating Goodbye came out. Before that, boys and girls in my church were expected to stay chaste. After that book came out, we were expected to stop having human thoughts and emotions. If I held a boy’s… Read more

October 15, 2018

It’s the first anniversary of #MeToo going viral. Last week was the 19th anniversary of the night a man broke into my home and set my bed on fire. This week is the 19th anniversary of the day I dropped out of college, which cost me a full scholarship, so my family and I could move out of state and out of that man’s reach. And that’s not even the experience I was thinking of when I posted #MeToo last… Read more

October 14, 2018

They said I was a morbid kid. Other kids wanted to visit Six Flags. I wanted to visit cemeteries. I don’t know how my fascination with death began. It might have grown out of all those times I heard my mother and I had almost died when I was born. I’ve always known I almost wasn’t. It could be because one of my earliest memories involves the death of a family member. Or because there was a family story about… Read more

October 11, 2018

It’s peak color season where I live. I’m probably supposed to tell you, “The trees are blazing with brilliant reds,” or something before talking about each leaf stirring in a gentle breeze, then lazily falling to the ground. And then I’d go on about the beauty of creation for 500 words. But I’m not going to do that. We delight in the beauty of trees losing their leaves, but they aren’t actually losing them. They’re throwing them off. Trees don’t… Read more

October 8, 2018

We’re at a turning point in history. It’s going to take a lot of work, but we can do this. We can change our culture. We can’t change much for those of us who are grown women. Most of us already bear the scars of a million cuts of injustice. We’ve already been knocked off our tracks by sexism and all the different ways we’ve lacked opportunities others have gotten without merit. We can’t undo what’s been done to us…. Read more

October 1, 2018

Most sexual assault survivors are supportive of other survivors, but sometimes a sexual assault victim comes along who isn’t supportive. Sometimes these victims are outright hostile toward survivors. It can be hard to understand why these fellow victims would try to throw other victims under the bus. In my experience, there are a few reasons this might happen, and I believe it’s important for us to be aware of these reasons as we’re having these difficult conversations. Safety in Silence… Read more

September 25, 2018

A couple of weeks ago, a good chunk of my town went offline for over a week. I’m back up now, though the connection still blinks out for a few hours each day because rural living, y’all. Now I’m trying to scramble and catch up on all the things I couldn’t get done while I was offline. Like most people, I do pretty much everything on the computer. I kept freaking out about my checking account balance getting low without… Read more

September 20, 2018

Let’s talk about crossing the line. It might not seem like a “church” issue, but it’s an issue in any place where humans cross paths. I’ve seen some complaints over the past year, ever since #MeToo started flying across our social media and a handful of well-known men with credible allegations against them lost, well not their lives or their wealth or their freedom, but their jobs. The main complaint from some men is they’re worried they can’t even speak… Read more

September 4, 2018

“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” – 2 Timothy 4:7 There are over 2 billion Christians in the world right now. How many did the apostles convert? We can’t know for sure, but it wasn’t anywhere close to 2 billion. After every hardship they endured, they left behind a few small communities of Christians. To most people living at that time, I’m sure it looked like a failure. As St…. Read more

August 29, 2018

Trigger Warning It wasn’t your fault. You were not complicit. You weren’t complicit if you didn’t fight back. You weren’t complicit if you went along with what an authority figure wanted. You weren’t complicit if you didn’t report it. You are never to blame. It’s not a sin to do what you need to do to survive. Sometimes fighting back is dangerous. If you freeze up and go along with it, that’s a very normal reaction, and you’ve done nothing… Read more

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