10 Reasons Why I Get Along With My Girlfriend’s Dildo

5. Haven’t I disappointed her enough?

When you get old you will have obtained a myriad of skills and abilities. Perhaps you can put a timing belt in your car? Maybe you have figured out to close your mouth and not breathe in when loading that spreader with fertilizer for your lawn?

I can disappoint whoever I am romantically involved with in many ways:

• I drink to excess.
• I wear that Green Lantern shirt that is older than my 14-year-old son.
• I am me. Look at that pic! I have prima facie written all over my face.