“It’s like their brains time-travel back to 1952”

In the past, I’ve done what I’ve called “awesome comment award.” I want to start doing something similar but more regular. I have a lot of readers who say many interesting things, and some of their comments call for a bit more spotlight.

Today I want to highlight a comment by reader snowmentality, left last week on one of my posts, “What’s Your Favorite Princess?”

I love that Sally had the self-confidence to say “I don’t have a favorite princess.” At her age, I probably would have just named the first princess I could think of, to give the adult what they were expecting to hear. (I can remember at least one specific example of a conversation I had at age 5 in which I consciously made up an answer to give an adult what they were expecting to hear.)

Also, in general, I love these posts so, so much. I may have mentioned it here before, but I’m at an age where many of my friends are having their first kids, and the gender role policing that happens with kids is just unreal. I’ve been stunned by how totally retrograde it all is. I mean, my friends are largely pretty progressive people, but at baby showers it’s like their brains time-travel back to 1952. Girls like pink and princesses and pretty dresses, and boys like blue and sports and trucks, and if you dare transgress those boundaries everybody loses their minds. Parents with older kids continually insist that girls just come preprogrammed to love princesses and boys just come preprogrammed to love trucks, and as a non-parent I don’t dare say “Are you sure that’s actually true? Could there be some confirmation bias?” (I mean, not that I would actually phrase it that way, but I don’t feel like I can say anything at all.)

I’ve been feeling pretty a lone, so I’m really happy to read these posts questioning and pushing back against the gender-role policing of kids. And the comments from other parents who are questioning it and pushing back against it, too.

Thank you.