by Doug Wilson of Blog and Mablog – The Manna of Anger
Editor’s note: A little good does not leaven or dismiss the toxic in Wilson’s continuing advice to this supposedly fictional abused young girl. Be angry, acknowledge your anger but don’t keep being angry is no answer! While volunteering and helping others can help you in recovery the most critical helpful bit that Wilson and others miss is ongoing counseling from a licensed mental health professional.
Your father’s offense against you, and his refusal to repent of it, presents you with a true offense, but it is a standing offense. He is in prison, and the sun has gone down many times since his sentencing. I would therefore urge you to avoid any kind of standing anger in response. The reason for that is not that the anger is unjust or misplaced, but rather that we have no way of “refrigerating it” to keep it from becoming rancid. And if it becomes rancid, it only hurts you. He wouldn’t know about it—off in prison, he is unaware of how he is affecting you. The wrong kind of anger won’t hurt him, and it will hurt you.
His offense against you is not a trifle, and your anger is not an over-reaction. Secondly, you are living in a situation where you could seek out a constructive outlet for that anger. Your aunt tells me that you have been volunteering at the counseling center, helping those who are helping others deal with situations very much like yours. Even though you are not counseling women directly, you can take your work there and offer it up to God. You can ask Him to receive it as the fruit of your anger.
QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders, cultural enforcers and those that seek to keep women submitted to men and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull and Spiritual Abuse honestly and thoughtfully.
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