Screen cap from YouTube of the couple that thinks they invented sex.

This week the internet and the tabloid press exploded over one of the truly dumbest things I’ve seen in a very long time – Jill Duggar Dillard and her husband Derick Dillard giving out more sex advice.

They’ve been married five years, which hardly makes them experts. Get back to me when you’re plus 25 years and had a boatload of real life experiences, complete with ups and downs, illnesses and trials, and we’ll talk. A real marital sex life involves more than being ‘joyfully available’ 24 hours a day 7 days a week.

Warning: Snark ahead!

Wait, wait, I’m going to need to anesthetize myself with a xanax, another cup of coffee and a cinnamon roll. Or maybe just some Dramamine.

Remember a few months ago when Jill was posting photos of sex games and a Kama Sutra book followed by her own ideas on sex? Now it’s Derick’s turn. This week Derick posted a long article about sex and marriage and Jill posted more dirty games on her Instagram.

Here’s what I want to know. What gives? Why all the sex games, advice, and sudden emphasis on sex with the Dillards? Is this the only way they have to stay in the public eye and even slightly relevant since it seems unlikely any more babies will be born of their union? I know when they say this stuff it drives huge hit numbers to their website, but this is all they got?

Derick gives his approval of birth control, seeming to hint that’s what they are doing in their marriage. I doubt it though, and think it’s more likely after two births that went sideways it’s likely Jill is unable to have any more children.

Still gagging over his blog post “Hot Love” and wondering why people not married that long are having to turn to games and reinforcement of sexuality in order to keep the marriage alive. Five years they should still almost be in that honeymoon period if I remember all the way back to then in my thirty plus years of marriage.

-Have lots of good sex! You both need this time together regularly (5-6 times (or more) a week is a good start). Guys, you need to keep yourself “joyfully available” for your wife, because only you can fulfill certain desires she might have.

Oh gawd! I just ruined one of my few good pairs of shoes here!

There is nothing I want to know about less than their sex life, unless it’s the sex life of Jill’s brother sex pest Josh Duggar. In fact, I don’t want to know anything about any of Duggars sex lives. Or the Kardashians.

Maybe this is one of those Millennial things I do not get, shouting about your sex life from the rooftops.

At this point the Duggars seem like they’ve morphed into an Evangelical version of the Kardashians, with slightly less flesh on display.

Josh is currently embroiled in a nasty lawsuit over property shenanigans, where he may have knowingly swindled someone. The case is about to get much uglier as his lawyers and Josh are ignoring the court requests during the discovery phase of the trial. That never works out well. The only reason to attempt to ignore discovery is because there’s something unseemly in the paperwork.

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