Mother Confesses: I Killed Two of My Children

 

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Rarely do you read something that feels like a punch in the stomach. But today, I read a blog that was so powerful, I just had to share.  It begins:

… The bumper sticker read, “Having an abortion does not make you un-pregnant, it makes you the mother of a dead baby”. The word “mother” struck me because “mother” is such a powerful word. It conjures many meanings, and when a woman becomes one she is fundamentally changed. “Mother” as a verb means to nurture, care for and protect. “Mother” as a noun means a female person who is pregnant with or gives birth to a child; or a female person whose egg unites with sperm, resulting in the conception of a child.

By this definition if you’ve ever been pregnant you are a Mother. Even if you’ve had an abortion you are still a Mother… a grieving Mother.

“A voice was heard in Ramah, sobbing and loud lamentation; Rachel weeping for her children, and she would not be consoled, since they were no more.” Matthew 2:18

There is no consolation to be had for the mother that loses a child. She will grieve in her heart for the rest of her life. Abortion; however, not only robs a child of it’s life and a mother of it’s child, it also robs the mother of her grieving. She is not allowed to grieve because she cannot publicly claim the title Mother.

Then, she gets personal.  Really personal.  She shares a secret that she’s been holding inside her for fifteen years.  Head over to her blog to read her story and maybe leave a note of encouragement.  I just wish I could hug this woman for having the courage to really speak out against the evils of abortion.

Read “Fifteen Years Later and Silent No More” and share it with a friend. Her message needs to reach as many people as possible.

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  • http://mostlyquestions.wordpress.com Bernard Shuford

    Another similar story is Tammy Hodge. She’s an awesome lady who aborted two children before finding Christ and making a huge difference in the world around her. http://www.taminprogress.com/my-story/

  • http://www.msswim.com Ian

    Bristol,

    That is a fantastic bumper sticker! Just Priceless!
    Great blog post.

  • Sue Lynn

    God Bless her!!!!! God excepts us and loves us that’s why He died and rose again and Lives today to draw us to Him and be saved for all time in His loving arms!!!!

  • Robin

    I’ve lost 3 babies and grieved for them for many years. Often if I’d see someone with little one’s it would hit like a punch in the stomach. The only thing that finally ended the grieving was God gave me a vision one day of the babies I’d lost. I knew they were in heaven, but, to actually see them immediately lifted the grief. My father had been dead for several years, the vision I had was, my dad was standing in front of me. He had one baby on his shoulder, one in his arms, and the other baby was clinging to his leg. The peace I had immediately was amazing. My father was smiling at me. It was all over in a split second but, the lasting affects of that one touch from God has lasted over 2 decades. He is the only way to true peace.

    • Paulette

      Bristol, thanks so much for sharing this blog with us! Thankfully God is a very forgiving Father, one who loves us in spite of our sins! Robin, my spirit lept when I read your message. My daughter who was a pure joy, passed when she was seven years old. My husband & I were standing in a quiet little room, holding hands with our pastor & praying when God gave me the vision of her with her long blonde hair & long white dress, she was skipping & picking wild white daisies with one hand while reaching up with her other hand, to place it into the hand of Jesus. I saw his hand as it touched hers, and I knew her time had come. As soon as I shared the vision, the nurse walked in to tell us the news, but we already had the peace of God that passes all understanding. We later found out several people within our church accepted Christ as a result of her death. Praise God as we were rejoicing although sadness touched our hearts at the same time.

  • bellagrazi

    If her personal experience with abortion prevents one woman from having one, then it will have been worth it. God bless her. Thank you for sharing her story, Bristol.

  • Joseppi

    A mother is not someone who simply gives birth. Any female or female animal can give birth but it takes a lot more than the act of giving birth to be called a mother.

    • Kirsten

      Amen!

  • Justine Stewart

    So sad but very courageous of her to speak about it. Thanks for sharing Bristol.

  • LMA

    A touching story, yes. Truly a courageous woman to share her truth. HOWEVER, what these women always fail to acknowledge is that if abortion hadn’t been legal, and if they hadn’t been able to obtain a safe abortion, they probably wouldn’t be here today to share their shame and regret. Abortion was made legal because so many women were having them anyway, and dying from the procedure. I always wonder exactly whose “sacred cow” abortion is, the ones who stand for preserving its legality and safety or those who would do away with it at any cost. When our lawmakers decide that affordable healthcare for all women and their children is a priority, that all women and their children deserve access to healthful food and quality public education, then you can start to question the usefulness of legal abortions. Until then, good luck pushing your morality on those who have their reasons to consider abortion.

    • Robin

      There isn’t a lot of difference from abortion clinics today and back alley abortions. Abortion clinics aren’t regulated. Abortion clinics are often filthy, they reuse medical equipment that isn’t meant to be reused, ect. Many women who are injured because of legal abortions and or killed, aren’t reported by the CDC as such. They usually are transported to an emergency room, the cause of death is listed as something other than abortion. Bleeding to death, sepsis, punctured uterus(not mentioning it was caused during an abortion), adverse reaction to anesthesia and other causes. It isn’t listed as caused by abortion, unless the woman dies at the abortion clinic.

      The procedure for doing an illegal abortion is much the same as it is today. They could be charged with murder and if caught doing an abortion could also be charged with a murder. If you were preforming an illegal abortion, wouldn’t you try very hard to be careful not to injure the woman? Many if you got caught back in the day, you were done.

      http://www.lifeissues.org/radio/r2000/r00-03/lr2275.html

      • LMA

        Sorry, but there are safe places to have abortions. I had an abortion in a clean, safe clinic. Maybe because I had money, I was in no danger of dying due to incompetence or filth. Though I appreciate your argument that causes of death after an abortion are listed as “something other than abortion…bleeding, sepsis, punctured uterus, adverse reaction to anesthesia…” these are not causes of death that are exclusive to abortions. I know of one person who died of an allergic reaction to anesthesia while undergoing a breast augmentation, and I know of another woman who bled to death after giving birth.

        • Robin

          I have a close relative that had two and another relative who had one and one friend, that I know of. The one relative was hit hard emotionally afterwards, not sure about the other one. My friend grieves over the one she had. She said when she had her son, the moment he was born, she realized what she had done. It might be safe physically, but, they are never safe emotionally or for the baby.

          • LMA

            I wouldn’t call it emotionally “unsafe.” It’s a difficult decision to make, but I have to say that I’ve made peace with my decision, and I believe that there are many women with a variety of reason for making the decision who are able to come to terms with it quite well. That’s not to say that I would do it again, but looking back, I’m glad that since I came to the decision to have an abortion that I had access to a safe one. And since I had it at 5 weeks, I don’t personally feel like I actually murdered a kid.

  • http://taminprogress.com tammy hodge

    i SO relate to this woman’s story. as bernard, commenter above, already mentioned, my story is so similar. I had two abortions as a teen. i kept those secrets hidden for years. until my first born was 5 months. once i started sharing, and understanding Gods forgiveness and finding the strength to forgive myself, everything began changing. i now have two children…18 and 15. i am writing a book about my journey. i had no idea when i was going through my first abortion that i would one day have to look my children in the eyes and tell them that i killed two babies. i wish when i was a teen i would’ve had the mindset to think of the future, consequences and impacts this would have on so many.

    tho i am grateful for the ministry it has provided!

    • Robin

      God bless you. I truly do feel for the women who’ve had them. They hurt everyone, and my heart goes out to you.

  • justinemee

    Bristol I understand where u are coming from honey, but not all women do this out of selfishness. In fact I had one out of love. I had had a baby two weeks prior and then I was pregnant again. As I had resummed taking serious medications my doc said we should watch the new baby for side effects. Two months later we checked the baby was missing an arm and its head seemed misshapen. The Dr. Told me the baby would probaby never talk or walk. The baby was going to be essentially a vegetable. With my docs assistance I chose to have an abortion. He told me the odds were so far in the negative I felt as if I was saving my baby from a lifetime of barely living. Of being an experiment for whatever life it had. I loved that baby enough to let it go. Believing in heaven as i do i knew he or she would be better off in heaven then being a lump of flesh waiting to die here. I wouldn’t want to live that way so I had no business sentencing someone else to. It’s not always selfishness just sayin.

    • Mrs. Sixx

      Thank you, dear, for telling the other side of the story. What you did was a kind and loving thing. I am sure that you will be blessed to see your child again some day. Bless you, sweetie.

  • Paul

    A friend of ours was pregnant and then lost the baby. It was a catalyst for her to stop using drugs, abandon atheism, and trust Jesus. I’m amazed at the change in her life. That baby had such incredible purpose, even though she never had a chance to be born.

  • http://www.TheEstherLegacy.com Robyn Refsland Lund

    I keep you and your family in my prayers, Bristol. I think of Trig often as well; I trust he’s doing great. Should you ever have time, please check out my website. Abortion is an ugly reality I wish did not exist.
    ~Robyn

  • Andy Sandoval

    Yes, Bristol. God makes no mistakes. Any child that is conceived is of God’s will. The way they were conceived is up to us. But once that baby is conceived, they are a creation of God.
    Can’t wait to watch your new TV series on Lifetime! Good Luck!

  • Emma Lora

    Of course… this blog will go out to others as well, the more the better. This is a great blog.
    More often this is seen, the more people will be informed, inspired, encouraged. I hope it will be printed on many blogs.

  • http://jeremylundmark.wordpress.com Jeremy Lundmark

    Thanks for this post. I’m grateful as a Pastor that there are great ministries like the Life Choices Center in Binghamton, NY that serve to give the *Hug* you described. Our church’s ministry doesn’t have the necessary resources to reach folks who have struggled through abortion or are struggling with it.

    http://www.lifechoicescenter.org/

  • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/thecrescat The Crescat

    Thank you for sharing my story.

  • Barbara Landi

    Many years ago I had a spontaneous abortion, ie, a miscarriage. That was bad enough! It’s a common thing, and no doubt many other women like me who have had a miscarriage, still wonder & question what they did wrong to cause it. Even though I don’t go to church much and I’m not very religious, I could never ever willfully kill my own fetus , or anyone else’s, under ANY circumstances. Hell I can’t even kill a chicken for a dinner.

  • Bob Woelfel

    Where can I buy those bumper stickers, I want to get them out !!!

  • Bob Woelfel

    Where can I buy this bumper sticker????

  • huntingmoose

    This blog hits it right on the head, and not so much for the ‘I murdered..’ part but for the mental tormenture later when it all is well and done.

    The catholic church takes the moment of conception, the legal system uses the moment of birth, for Obama you are not alive if the administrative decision was made before you were born to kill you,Ezekiel Emanuel who Obama wanted for health care policy advisor thinks life starts when you are 5 years old or something like that and I like many others, admit I don’t know the answer but like many others prefer to err on the save side.

    Unfortunately, many will when confronted with unplanned pregnancy choose what seems easy at that moment but not so easy mentally afterwards.

    There is a lot of attention spend to prevent contracting diseases like AIDS. They should also spend a lot of attention to this mental disease you will get from an abortion, immediately after or at a later time.

    With AIDS, abstinence is the only sure preventive measure. With unplanned pregnancy, abstinence is not the only preventive measure; you can also prevent this mental disease by choosing life.

  • http://julie@borkowskifamily.com politicaljules

    Thank you. So many of us suffer in silence thinking the ‘choice’ was supposed to make it all better. It didn’t. You could not turn to any side for consolation. Or so I thought. It has been the pro life side that grabs you and hugs you tight saying it will all be ok. That is some of the most amazing healing that has ever come my way. No judging. No screaming at me. Just hugging, and telling me to know I am forgiven.

  • Joanne Mayo

    I, too, was silent for many decades. The grief was very intense and painful, but God in His graceful forgiving ways brought me to a full productive life. Now I have my own grandchildren to cherish and be extra thankful for. The pain slowly scars over but I think God allows you to remember some of it so you can reach out to others who are hurting and say “I know—I’ve been there”. The realization is predominant to me that since I deserve hell, my future reunion in heaven with my little one will be covered totally by God’s grace and His grace alone.

  • http://bastionofliberty.blogspot.com Francis W. Porretto

    Pilar hesitated before the sacristy door. Gail Borden turned to her with eyebrows raised.

    “They’re waiting for you, P.”

    Pilar nodded and looked down. “I know. I just don’t know how ready I am for this. Gail, couldn’t you…?”

    The big blonde woman took her by the shoulders and squeezed gently. “It’s your show, P. They all know it’s your show, not mine. You’re the sparkplug, and it’s time to fire. Do you need a glass of water or something?”

    “No, I…” I need to be somewhere else. Somebody else. “Okay, let’s go.”

    Gail looked at her critically for an instant longer, then took her hand and led her out into the church. They were greeted by applause of surprising volume and duration.

    Gail left her standing there at the altar rail and squeezed herself onto a front pew. Pilar was alone and defenseless before the crowd.

    And a crowd it was. Every pew was filled to capacity. Both walls were lined with standees, and more clustered at the back before the tall oaken double doors to the church. There were at least five hundred people there, all of them watching her, awaiting her words.

    It is not for me. I am no one. It cannot be for me.

    “I…”

    They are here because they care, or because they bear a guilt like mine. But it is not for me.

    “I…”

    I cannot do this without Father Keane!

    She clamped her lips together and prayed swiftly for strength. The church was silent.

    “You are here,” she faltered, “because you care about the unborn. You have seen and heard and read about the slaughter around us until it has sickened you to the core of your soul. Thinking about it makes you want to rip out your heart. And you want to do something about it. You just don’t know what to do.

    “I must confess this to you: I don’t know what to do either.”

    She waited for a cry of protest. None came.

    “We know what not to do. We know not to do it because we have done it, and it has not worked. Politics. Protest marches. Letter-writing campaigns. Carrying angry signs in front of abortion clinics. We have tried all of that, and the blood still flows.

    “I am not the smartest of women. I clean other people’s houses for a living. I have no husband, no children, and no education. I live in an apartment so small that I must fold up my bed before I can set up a table to eat on. I am no one and nothing.

    “But I am smart enough to know that one does not continue with what does not work. We must try other ways.”

    The crowd’s murmur flowed caressingly over the church walls.

    I must give them what I have, or I have called them together for nothing.

    “I know a woman who stopped an abortion once. She had a friend, not a Catholic, who confided to her that she had betrayed her husband with another man, and had become pregnant. The friend could think only of killing her baby to save her from the shame of her sin. But the friend had never had an abortion, and did not know what to expect. The woman knew, for she had had one, even though she was a Catholic.

    “The woman told her friend of the event, the fear that came before and the terrible shame that gripped her after. She told her friend about being opened to the instrument of death, feeling it enter her and suck out her baby to feed its hunger. She told of the horror, the guilt, the sense of having been disconnected from God. And because she had spoken from her heart, from the truth her sin had etched into her bones, her friend listened, and believed, and changed her mind.”

    A second murmur raced around the room. The attention of the huge crowd was riveted upon Pilar, compelling her to complete the story she had not known she would tell.

    “The woman…” Her voice cracked and fell to a whisper. “The woman who’d had the abortion was me.” She bowed her head.

    There had never been a silence like the one that filled St. Gregory’s in that moment. It was a thing of such palpable grief that it seemed the church might fail to hold it, might burst to let it mushroom through the city, down every street and into every home for miles around.

    Dear God, give me strength enough to face them.

    She looked out once more across the throng that filled the church. The sea of faces was still fixed raptly upon hers. The eyes were uniformly bright with the glitter of tears.

    “So we know…we know it can be done. We know we can reach them, awaken their hearts to what they propose to do to their babies, if we have the truth, and the desire. We will not always succeed. But we know it can be done. And I think this is what we must try.

    “We should talk about our attempts, whether they succeed or fail. We should keep records. We should invite others not of our faith to join us in our efforts. We should be warm to those we counsel, not scold or threaten. We should be good confidants, and good allies, and good friends.

    “That is what I am going to do. It is all I know how to do.” She spread her arms to encompass the gathering. “Will you help me?”

    The church exploded with the thunder of clapping hands and the music of joyous cheers. Dozens of men and women surged forward to embrace Pilar. They lifted her off her feet and bore her aloft, down the center aisle, through the great double doors and into the sunset glow like an icon of life and hope.
    ————————
    May God bless and keep you, always.

  • http://reddit.com asena

    truth is god’s mind.
    we are but little beings with very primitive faculties to perceive the world around us, our perceptions show us only so much. with such a limited understanding, we must not claim to know god’s mind. truth superceeds your thoughts about the truth. i reiterare: truth is god’s mind.

    now language is another story. 8 out of 10 pregnancies self abort. Many miscarry. These people do not lose a child. They lose an undeveloped organism with the potential.

    A dead child is a REAL PERSON, dying in a burn unit because she can’t have skin from embriyonic stem cells. some people ignore the facts and insist god gets upset. can god be this petty?

    god already knows who will survive. why insist on turning ALL of those 2/10 of pregnancies into human beings? why risk women’s lives because an imbecile pharmacist doesn’t understand and egg IS NOT a chicken. a chicken has eyes, lungs, wings, needs, fears. an egg does not have these. an embriyo is no more a child than a baby is an old man with alzheimer’s.

    • http://reddit.com asena

      i’ve been through abortion. if you don’t make it into something it’s not, it’s alright.

      i insist: god cannot be this petty.

      Do you know what happens to a baby whose mother “resents” the baby once born and neglects/abuses the little one for the first two years?

      BAM! Psychopath. They cannot bond aanymore: No empathy, no compassion, no consciense.
      not good for lord’s flock i tell you what..

      • djgsom4ever

        I know this is an old post, but I must respond. 1. No one can predict the future except God. To assume that every mother will resent her baby and turn into a psychopath is an unreal worse case senario based on fear. She may have an unexpected bonding she never thought she could.
        2. Once a women is pregnant there is another choice called adoption. So many women who can’t have kids waiting to adopt. Could be a joyful experience for both parties.
        3. We should encourage women to protect against getting pregnant if they are sure they might resent having a child and turn into a psycopath. There are many easy options out there. Not having sex is an unpopular but full proof method.
        4. A baby is a baby. It is not good for the flock to have a baby killed. I am pretty sure God doesn’t like seeing a child he loves get killed.
        5. God also doesn’t like seeing a child he loves go through the hardship of having and abortion. He loves that person and wants to make her whole again.

  • Ashley Marie Ostrowski

    Question: if you believe that abortion is murder, than should this woman be prosecuted? There’s no statute of limitation for what would be paramount to first degree murder? Would all women who’ve had abortions be charged? What about the father, friends or family members who knew? Are they accomplices?

    • Michael Mumme

      Answer: The aspect you forget is they are the ones consenting it. If you would argue the “my body my choice” as pro-choice advicates claim you would have to look up the statute and limitations for suicide patients. The case and point being that if the woman claims the baby is an aspect of her body and the doctor is performing a procedure that does not foster or better its development; than the intent is to destroy or harm. This now means the doctor is aiding in self-destruction/mutilation charges and the woman needs to be treated for her decision is not of sound mind or logic.

      It is not against the law to kill yourself, it is against the law to aid somebody in killing themselves.

      My simple conclusion to your question is they woman is a victim to herself, the doctor is the one carrying out the consentual act. And any and all parties who do not seek to prevent nor educate the individuals are guilty of inaction and accessories to the crime that the abortionist carries out.

      Feel free to message me back I would love to shed further light and reasoning on this matter.

      • Ashley Marie Ostrowski

        And what happens when there is no doctor? Gabriela Flores was sentenced to 90 days in jail for taking Cytotec to end her pregnancy. Amber Abreu also took Cytotec and recieved probation and therapy. Yaribely Almonte was arrested for using herbs to end her pregnancy but the charges were ultimately dropped. Jennie McCormack was able to buy RU-486 online. At first she was charged with inducing her own abortion, a felony in Idaho which carries a possible sentence of 5 years.

    • djgsom4ever

      You decide. It is a murder when someone kills a baby the second it comes out of the womb (except partial birth abortions). It is not a murder (per the law) when a pregnant woman has her baby killed in her womb (sometimes up to full term). It is a double homicide in some states when a pregnant women is killed. Don’t you think something is horribly wrong? Should an individual’s choice negate the legal protection of anothers life. I think women have been lied to by society and our so called leaders. Let us just start with honesty and removing the blinders of what abortion is, the taking of a life.

      • Ashley Marie Ostrowski

        There has been an estimated 53 million abortions since 1973. Our current prison population is around 2 million. If there’s no statute of limitation for murder, how long do you think it would take for women who only had one abortion to get through the court system? What would the penalty be? How much would the appeals process alone cost the American tax payer? If you truly want abortion to be illegal, then there are going to be a lot of costs and consequences.

        • djgsom4ever

          No retroactive crime as it was legal when they did it. Restrict, fines, and free education to try to discourage abortions if at all possible. Long term goal, illegal. In the end, the truth is a life was taken with no choice of that baby’s. Plead with people to prevent preganacy if not wanting a baby.

  • http://swwest.origamiowl.com Shannon

    Skillet’s song “Lucy” is about an aborted baby. The teenage parents were told that in order to “get over” the abortion, they needed to grieve the loss. They decided the baby would have been a girl and named her Lucy.

  • Ron

    This whole concept of grieving the loss of a murdered child is simply a reflection of the narcissistic, pseudo-Christian false religion which pervades American culture.

    Does a murder “grieve” the loss of the people he slaughtered? No. It is a distraction from what actually happened: a mother, caring more about her personal convenience than her own flesh and blood, sacrificed her unborn child on the altar of Molech. For this same incredibly wicked offense, God punished Israel severely.

    We need to be grieving over our self-absorbed, narcissistic way of thinking which allows these atrocities to even exist in America. We need to be grieving our sin. We need to be on our knees before the God whose children we’ve arrogantly snuffed out, begging for a heart of repentance for our nation.

    We need to be begging for God’s mercy, and that He will turn our hearts back to His Son Jesus Christ. Jesus is the ONLY way to salvation. He is the Narrow Gate which leads to life. All other paths lead to destruction and death.

    We certainly do NOT need to be teaching mothers to engage in some narcissistic grieving process over their murdered babies, as if they’re some kind of victim. We need to remember who is the perpetrator of the atrocity: the mother, who, for the sake of her own convenience, put her own flesh and blood, her own baby, to death.

    This kind of self-absorbed, narcissistic psycho-babble being promulgated in the name of “Christianity” — it needs to stop. Let the former baby murderers become activists, militant activists if necessary, against the very atrocities of which they are guilty. That’s called “repentance.” Turning from sin, turning to Christ, and doing battle against the very evil which we once wantonly engaged in.

    If we want mercy, we need to be a merciful people. There is no mercy in killing a helpless unborn baby. God is not mocked: we will reap what we sow.

    • Cheryl

      So, would grievance over sin be a more acceptable wording for you? If we are to be sorrowfully repentive and seeking grace, mercy, and forgiveness would there not be grieving? Ron, I appreciate your fervor, but you lack the love and compassion Jesus displayed for the woman caught in adultery. Don’t worry, there’s plenty of justice dealt out to the sinner, you just might not always see it or have any part giving it. God has designed people, especially women to need a softer approach than stoning to rightly bring them into correct standing with Him. I am glad you are so strongly convicted. I hope that you are as scrutinizing with yourself as you are with others. If so you are definitely a moral role model, a godly man, and a fierce warrior for the Kingdom, thank you.

    • MilliVillainy

      And you’ll burn for being judgemental, and passing judgement. By your own God’s rule. Guess you’ll also be hanging around in hell with your condemed murderers since all sin is equal in God’s eyes. Try some loving thy neighbor. May change your world.

      • Ron

        Ah yes…another Scripture twister. I get this all the time. Let me guess, your favorite verse is Matthew 7:1. Let’s read the whole passage, shall we?

        “Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.

        “Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.

        —–

        Completely different meaning in context, isn’t it? In fact, Christians are called to judge righteously and to keep our own lives in order so that when we do call out sin, we aren’t being hypocritical.

        Galatians 6:1-4:
        Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself. But let each one test his own work, and then his reason to boast will be in himself alone and not in his neighbor. For each will have to bear his own load.

        —–

        No, Milli. It seems to me that you should stop twisting the Scriptures, lest you be like Satan. Don’t be a deceiver. Be a follower of Christ.

        • MilliVillainy

          Id rather not follow someone who makes me a hateful asshole toward people for living their lives. Have fun being a hate for life. Ill go uplift folk and do the job Christians claim they’re doing.
          Have a “blessed” life.
          And honestly that first scripture sounds about right. Lots of “Christians” I know are sinners.
          Have sex with your girlfriend?
          Lust?
          Steal?
          Covet?
          Lie?
          I know “Christians” who do that all day long and don’t seek to regulate it or everyone else doing it.

          • Ron

            You are confused about the meaning of hatred vs. love. You have them exactly backward. It is NOT hatred to warn someone of impending danger which will come if they remain on the path they’re currently on.

            The ONLY reason I speak about the Gospel message and warn people about living a life without Christ, is the eternal consequences. My desire is not to see one person die in their sins. Of course, it is an impossible goal — but it is my duty to speak out against what the Scriptures define as evil, and to point people to Christ.

            If you are a Christ-hater, then you obviously be hateful and intolerant of that message. In that case, good luck to you. I did my part.

            Just remember: judgment day is coming. There is a way out: Jesus Christ. If you follow Him, you have nothing to worry about. But in order to follow Him, you have to love Him more than your sin. Not an easy thing to do, which is why so many people completely miss the boat, yourself included.

            But like I say, good luck to you.

          • MilliVillainy

            I don’t hate the theory of Christ. But I do hate your disgusting interpretation of it.
            Your truth is a lie and your right is wrong. I’m pretty sure what you mean by spreading the message is condemning people you consider wrong by your skewed biblical interpretations. I spent most of my life raised in a church. I have never been a believer and I’ve spent over half my life at this point looking into the bible and other religious texts and I can see that most people who preach on the texts just pull some vague interpretation from it that doesn’t truly mean that. I was told at one point by a pastor that being unequally yolked was telling us that races shouldn’t mix.
            Isn’t that disgusting?
            I hear crazy bullshit like this all the time.
            How can you even think to put all your faith in a book that has been edited by so many evil doers and heretics. Do you really think that at this point it truly resembles and represents truth and good? I derive my good from within, I live my life as an example of how I think humans should exist, when I see people in need I try to help them by showing them a different way, I don’t claim my way is the truth or the only way to achieve a good life, but, atleast I don’t sit around and tell them how wrong they are by some book that I can’t truly be sure is correct. I mean, if you’ve actually read it back to back (Like myself, several different interpretations) you can actually see the parts where the stories don’t align. Even the story of Jesus’ life has holes in it. You get different accounts of his hanging on the cross in different books and different accounts of his ascension into heaven. Religion is an outdated control tactic that was used to give the masses morals so it could pull us out of darkness. It was a great thing for what it did, and if you really read the teaching of Jesus you do find some excellent moral teaching there, but we’ve been ushered out of the dark ages and religion is now holding up progress and is being used to perpetuate and validate peoples hateful beliefs and actions.
            Maybe you should get on the “Let’s try to help my fellow man instead of judging them and bible thumping” boat before you get left behind.

          • Ron

            Sorry, Milli. But your incoherent rant is going nowhere. You’re wasting your time and mine. You passed judgment on me and condemned me, saying:
            “And you’ll burn for being judgemental[sic], and passing judgement[sic].”

            How can you make such an assertion if you’re not even a believer? Sounds like you’re just trying to do exactly the same thing you accuse me of: being self-righteous, judgmental, condemning; taking upon yourself the prerogative of God to say who is going to make it and who is not.

            BTW, the pastor who told you mixed marriages are wrong is an idiot. I happen to be in a mixed marriage, and I know plenty of Christians who are in mixed marriages. Nowhere in the Bible does it condemn mixed marriages. In fact, if you look at Song of Solomon, that was most likely a mixed marriage. The OT prohibition against Jews marrying Canaanites was specifically to prevent the Jews from taking on the pagan traditions and worship rituals of the Canaanites, which were disgusting to God, and included burning their newborn babies alive on the altar of Molech. Anyone who is condemning mixed marriages today, is using it as a cover for racism.

            You said, “I derive my good from within…”
            Sorry, that’s not good enough, and never will be.
            Isaiah 64:6:
            But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.

            And you don’t get to call the Scriptures “crazy bullshit” without completely losing all credibility. So…I’m done listening to your nonsense. According to the Scriptures, you are a fool, wise in your own eyes. Your pride prevents you from accepting Christ’s authority over your life or your opinions — which you would do well to keep to yourself, because right now you are showing exactly how much you hate God and those whom He has called to minister to you. You’re not only confusing love with hatred, but teaching others to do the same. You are a false teacher. You also are a coward, because you don’t even have the courage to face your own sin and realize that, just like the rest of us, you desperately need a Savior.

            I’ll pray that the Holy Spirit shocks you out of the self-righteous, works-based stupor in which you’ve been living, and gives you just a tiny glimpse of your sin the way God sees it. And I pray that you’ll have a come-to-Jesus moment the way Paul did on the way to Damascus. You need to see your utter depravity the way God sees it. And you’re no different than anyone else in this matter. We’re all completely depraved, and we all need the same Savior. His name is Jesus.

            Good day, sir…or madam. I have no clue which you are, because you cowardly use a pseudonymn to make your hateful postings. Zero credibility.

          • MilliVillainy

            Sir, I just realized that you can’t read or comprehend what I wrote. If you re read the words I typed out then you’ll notice the point where I say that the bible is a book that people interpret however they see fit. I already know that the bible says nothing about mixed relationships, I was saying that someone chose to take that verse and twist it to mean what they wanted it to, just like you do so you can condemn women who need help.

          • MilliVillainy

            Oh, and my name is Amelia Sloan. Im not scared to stand behind my opinions. You would just like to label me as a coward.

          • MilliVillainy

            In fact, after reading your reply and re reading my post. It’s clear to me that you just skimmed around and didn’t actually look at the words typed out for you.
            I never called scripture bullshit, I called what I was told bullshit. I actually said that Jesus had good teachings and most of what is wrong with you christians are you just define the bible to your own definitions. Get it together, man.

    • Jenn

      Ron,
      I’d love to meet you over coffee to explain to you just how much you don’t understand what you’re talking about.
      You’re correct. God is not mocked.
      But, condemnation belongs to Him alone.
      Stop judging and deciding who deserves mercy, who should be allowed to grieve and mourn and how the post-abortive woman can best serve the Lord. God’s got it covered. He doesn’t need your help in this area. Trust me.
      Do the pro-life movement a favor- shut up and stick to praying. You’re not helping us reach the women and their unborn who need our help.

      • Ron

        Did you misunderstand something I said?

        I know some women who have made this horrible decision decades ago. They don’t consider themselves victims. They know exactly what the Scripture says about committing murder, and they know they’re guilty. Some are now pastors’ wives; some work in crisis pregnancy centers. That’s repentance. Each of us should remember from whence we came, while holding fast to Christ and keeping our eyes on the straight and narrow path ahead. Only the Holy Spirit can grant true repentance.

        Mourning the victim is fine, but it would be far more productive to mourn over our own depraved nature — MYSELF included. My only point was that we should not confuse victim and perpetrator, and the perpetrator should not turn things around in their mind in order to come across as a victim.

        You’re right: God has this stuff covered. And I’m not in any position to decide who deserves mercy and grace, and who does not. But let’s be honest: if we take a laissez-faire approach to sin, and a narcissistic approach to repentance, then we really need to question whether we’re following the Jesus of the Bible, or some pseudo-jesus which we’ve made up in our own minds and who has no power to save souls and transform lives.

        Ephesians 4:28 comes to mind as an excellent picture of true repentance:
        Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need.

        I’m not judging anyone. There are plenty of things in my life I struggle with, as an admitted, recovering, wretched sinner. The reason I made the original post, is that I know that it’s human nature to try to make ourselves into victims when that is actually the furthest thing from the truth. I’ve done it, and I bet everyone else has as well.

        • Jenn

          Dear Ron,

          I don’t think I’ve “misunderstood” you. You said,

          “This whole concept of grieving the loss of a murdered child is simply a reflection of the narcissistic, pseudo-Christian false religion which pervades American culture.”

          “We certainly do NOT need to be teaching mothers to engage in some narcissistic grieving process over their murdered babies, as if they’re some kind of victim.”

          “Let the former baby murderers become activists, militant activists if necessary, against the very atrocities of which they are guilty.”

          Ron,you are correct. Sin is a choice. But when someone has asked for forgiveness, God “remembers your sins no more.” Your words judge that grieving only belongs to those YOU feel “deserve” it.

          You said,

          “But let’s be honest: if we take a laissez-faire approach to sin, and a narcissistic approach to repentance”.

          What that really sounds like is, “I’ll decide if you’ve repented enough for the sin you’ve committed.”

          When a woman is seeking healing after an abortion, she is grieving. Her lost child, motherhood as well as her sin. Isaiah said God sent him to “bind up the brokenhearted…comfort all who mourn…provide for those who grieve” and he was talking to those who had caused their own situation by sinning against God! God DELIGHTS in restoration. He LOVES us. He loves these women and their babies. He sent his Son because he so loves this world and the sinners in it. He sent His Son not to condemn the world, but save it through Him.

          When you see a post-abortive woman, you see a “former baby murderer”. She must become a “militant activist” if she’s truly repentant. Really? Well, some women may serve by working at a pregnancy resource center, but some may not. Jesus didn’t tell the adulterous woman, “Go and sin no more. And become an anti-adultery militant activist teaching the masses.” All sin has consequences, but it’s God’s design how we serve Him after we repent. And YOU may never see what that design is. Maybe that woman shares with just one person what God has done for her. Again, God’s got it covered. You don’t need to make sure the consequences are apportioned correctly for the sin, nor do YOU need proof of SOMEONE ELSE’S repentance.

          Jesus brought the adulterous woman to repentance through love, so drop the rock. Yes, speak truth, but speak it with love. Speak with love and you will speak life to the dying.

          While we’re speaking of these mothers who cared only of their own “convenience”, have you given any thought to the fact that not all women chose abortion for convenience? Not all, but MANY women experience either coercion (from the boyfriend, husband or parents) to abort or they have little to no support to make a life affirming choice. These women didn’t, and still don’t arrive in that situation alone. Consider what a difference it would make if the father of the baby would commit WITHOUT RESENTMENT OR BLAME to be there, to do the best they could to be a good dad. Yes, there will be women who will still choose abortion, but the numbers would be very different. Do you ever consider what choice you might be capable of making in a desperate circumstance?Humility recognizes that each of us is capable of ANY sin.

          When you meet or see a single mother, do you really truly in your heart rejoice that she chose life, or is there a part of you that thinks, “Well, she made a choice and got pregnant.” Do you have a deep love for others? Do you have compassion for all?

          I wasn’t going to reply to your post, but I thought about it for quite a while and I did pray about it. I really want to honor God with what I say, and what I do. I want others to know God isn’t hateful towards those he created. He loves us and gave us EVERYTHING. I know, because I’m one of those women.

          Because of grace,
          Jenn

          • Ron

            Hi Jenn,

            Thanks for you reply. There’s nothing I disagree with about what you’re saying.

            I like Ephesians 4:28 as a picture of repentance:
            Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need.

            My point is, we need to be really examining our hearts and be sure we’re advocating for repentance and faith in Christ, over healing. Nothing wrong with advocating for healing, but not at the expense of the Gospel message.

            Some things in this life will never heal. Some burdens will never be completely lifted this side of eternity. We need to be careful about mixing man-made psychological concepts (which have no power to save and no power to reform a corrupt heart) with the unadulterated Gospel of grace. When I read about God’s love, what strikes me most is the fact that it’s His kindness which brings us to repentance. And that repentance invokes an overwhelming desire to serve Him. The tone of the original article, I felt, focused too much on the psychological healing aspects — to the detriment of the Gospel message of true repentance (turning from sin, and turning to Christ in faith). I do believe it is a sign of the end times when even those who call themselves Christians advocate for man-made psychological pursuits over repentance and faith in Christ, who alone can save souls and change corrupt hearts. I believe that is our Jeremiah 17:9 heart in action when we seek healing over true repentance and faith. I realize that repentance and faith are precipitated by the Holy Spirit working in our hearts, which can only come by God’s grace. As a result, I feel we should be focusing more on serving, ministering to, and praying for those who are in these situations where they might seek an abortion.

            This was the main point I was trying to make: that focusing on psychological healing rather than the more pressing need for a Savior is a huge problem. If we’re in Christ, then our sin is covered. No need to mourn over it any more — unless we don’t believe what God says. Please forgive me if I’ve expressed my point incoherently or offensively — that’s on me. I’m no great communicator. I’m just a sinner, saved by grace, trying to reach out to the lost by any means possible.

            And I do understand that there is coercion and lack of support in many situations, which leads the woman to give in. But regardless of the situation, even if she feels she has no other choice, in the end, the woman who aborts has sacrificed her baby in order to make her own situation more bearable. These coercive and unsupportive scenarios are why it is a good thing when those who have been through this atrocity can dedicate a portion of their time to help others avoid it — especially those who wrongly feel that they have no other choice. Helping the helpless glorifies God, and also provides the psychological healing many are seeking. Glorify and serve God first, and the healing will come in time. It’s hard to be down on yourself when you’re walking with the Lord, amen?

          • MilliVillainy

            Ron, I don’t think you know it yet, but you are an asshole.
            You may not think you’re an asshole, but most assholes don’t think they are.

  • Kirsten

    “Mother” doesnt only mean someone who becomes physically pregnant. I am mother to 4 amazing kids, and not one came from my body. Two were supposed to be aborted but were not, and gave me the opportunity to become mother. I know your intention, but remember not all “mothers” that read your posts will be biological.

    • Ron

      You must be one great mother. Happy Mothers’ Day!

  • MilliVillainy

    You people are the messed up ones. Maybe its not your place to make decisions for others. You don’t know their lives.

    Doesn’t your precious bible say judge not, lest you be judged.
    I have no problem with religion, but I do have a problem with people trying to dictate others lives. That’s not what any religious figure wants. This is their journey and their decisions will impact them in their own personal way. It’s not your place to sit around like hens and cluck on some message boards about how morally superior you are, because you aren’t. You’re judgemental and calloused against those with issues. You’re the type to push those who need help down and you should all be ashamed.
    It’ll be you “burning in hell” next to these “murderers” for your own crimes against your fellow human.

    • MilliVillainy

      And this is all coming from an under 25 year old. You older women need to look at your lives and go do some good instead of condeming people trying to do what is best in their lives. Get out and go to a soup kitchen, go comfort that poor girl who just made one of the hardest decisions in her life instead of bashing her and trying to make her feel worse so you can justify how moral you are, your God doesn’t think you’re moral for that. He thinks you’re cold and evil for looking down on your fellow man. The world is a bad enough place without you people making it worse with your disgustingly judgemental attitudes. Grow up already and try to behave like you actually believe in the bible if that is the religion you claim.


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