I Used To Be You

I Used To Be You August 3, 2011

When I first started this blog, most of my networking was among other opponents of Christian Patriarchy. It just so happens that most of those blogging against these things happen to be religious. I’m not. When I came out on my blog as an atheist, I wasn’t sure what my Christian readers would think. I have been pleased to find that you have accepted me as an ally against Christian Patriarchy regardless of my lack of belief. You have been willing to agree to disagree. Recently, though, the comment thread on one of my posts turned into a debate that centered in part on whether I actually “got” certain aspects of Christian belief. So I’ve decided to take a moment to clarify some things and adjust a few rules with regards to my blog.

Please understand when you read my blog that you are getting the perspective of a twenty something woman who was raised on the line between Fundamentalism and Evangelicalism, then became a conservative Catholic, then a liberal Catholic, then an Agnostic, and then an Atheist. If you are a Christian, you will naturally disagree with posts that tackle religion directly, though not necessarily with posts that tackle elements of fundamentalist religion, homeschooling, patriarchy, or authoritarianism.

Understand that I am not trying to deconvert anyone. I am simply putting my thoughts into words and perhaps along the way providing a perspective some of you may not have heard before. I like to challenge people to think, but I don’t have an agenda! And if you don’t want to read posts you’ll disagree with, you don’t have to!

Please don’t try to argue with me over who God is or or over which doctrinal point I am misunderstanding. I’ve heard your arguments before. You see, I used to be you. In fact, I’ve said the same things you are saying many times before. I get it. I understand what you are saying, and the argument you are making. I just disagree.

The reality is, I’ve heard all the arguments many many times, and I have come to the conclusion that there is no God. It’s hard for you to fathom, I know, but that’s how it is. You are probably sure that I’ve misunderstood something somewhere along the line and that if you can only set me straight I’ll come back to God. You may not be able to fathom understanding the arguments and knowing God and then leaving. You may think that I must have misunderstood something, or must be bitter. Again, I get it. I was you.

If you think I’m wrong, that’s fine. Feel free to share your opinion by leaving comments – I enjoy reading those! – just please simply share your thoughts and leave it at that. I don’t need you to argue with me or try to persuade me that I am wrong. If you think this means I have a closed mind, well, feel free to think that! But instead of arguing with me could you instead simply pray that the Holy Spirit will lead me back to Jesus? And if you’re that bothered, you can always send me an email!

Just please don’t act like I have no idea what I’m talking about. Please don’t act like I somehow missed some important point and you can lead me to the Truth. Please don’t try to diagnose me with some spiritual problem or tell me where I went wrong. I really don’t need that.

The truth is that I am not uninformed. I studied apologetics as a child and read the Bible every day. I even studied Greek so that I could read the New Testament. After I left fundamentalism I read reams of Christian apologetics and poured over the Bible. I spent hours in prayer and sought to listen to the lead of the Holy Spirit. I studied the writings of the early church fathers and the history of Christianity. Jesus was my best friend. Then, as I left religion entirely, I did even more reading. I read history, archaeology, theology, and science. It’s not like I’ve ever made a religious belief or lack of it lightly. Even today, I continue to find religion fascinating. You see, religion has left a stamp on my life that will never disappear. I continue to study religion in detail, and I am well aware of the wide diversity of Christian belief, and that it has done good as well as evil. I am not ignorant of this and I don’t need you to set me straight.

This is my blog, my space. I don’t have to prove anything to you. I want this blog to be somewhere where I can freely speak my mind. If you disagree with something I write, feel free to say so – I’m not asking people not to comment, I really do enjoy reading different perspectives! – but please simply state your thoughts and then leave it at that. I have the right to my views, even if you think they’re wrong, just as you have the right to yours.

And really, there are bigger fish to fry than the atheist on the blog next door. To name a few: Patiarchy, Vision Forum, Authoritarianism, Bill Gothard, So Much More and the Botkins, the anti-woman policies of the religious right, and the legalism surrounding courtship, purity, and modesty. So let’s agree to disagree and focus on problems like these!

 


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