relentessly catholic yard

Relentlessly Gay Yard, Meet My Relentlessly Catholic Yard…

... When I moved into my new home I announced the arrival that the Papists where coming, not with trumpets and loud gongs, but with statuary. Lots and lots of statuary. My yard looks like a damn cemetery minus the dead people.In other words, I have a relentlessly Catholic yard.I also know for a fact that my relentlessly Catholic yard annoys the hell out of my neighbors. How do I know? They've told me so. Can you be anymore Catholic, they've asked?Why yes, yes I can.Little did I know I missed a very profitable opportunity. Apparently H8 pays well these days and being a "victim" and crying "TRIGGERED" is big business.Meet the 'relentlessly gay gardener' … [Read More...]

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These Shows Need to Exist on EWTN Now…

... Catholic Viral mashed up a few posts from Holy Whapping, Acts of the Apostasy, and yours truly to create this bit of amazing.You're looking at a design by Catholic Viral based on proposed Catholic comedies and reality TV shows that need to exist now. The above is a reality series I suggested based on large Catholic families, where camera crews follow a day in the life of the Donaldson clan.Below is a redecorating show based on an experience I had in RCIA when a sponsor told me I should have a crucifix in every room.Basically someone shows up to a recent convert's home and adds the obligatory Catholic "flair." The show would look something like … [Read More...]

hey its better than nothing

Weekly Random Roman Roundup…

... Catholic things that end up in my media feed.Padre Pio + tonsures = Catholic bad asserySt. Ann's Catholic Church in Charlotte has a beautiful new mural.but...Tu etiam levare, fra?I kid. I kid. I can't wait to see the mural installed. St Ann is easily the most beautiful church in the area. But don't get too attached the six pack, ladies. I have it on good authority that St. John the Baptist will be covered so as not to intimidate the physically inferior.Polish President, Andrej Duda, saves a Host during mass.TAC Student Put In The Stocks After Admitting She Did Not Enjoy Reading Kristin Lavransdatter.And this nun. … [Read More...]

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Hiss.Spit.Growl.Punch.Stab.Kick…

... Diet update, week whatever.Current weight : 279 (yeah it went up)Current mood : whatever, pass the nachosProjected outcome : Who the hell caresWarning: I'm about to drop a couple well deserved expletives. Clear the kids out of the room.Things I've Learned- There is so only so much poached chicken a person can eat - Don't look at yourself in the mirror while working out. It's not pretty.sourceInspiration- These people, I suppose.NSV- I haven't stabbed anyone yet.General ThoughtsFuck it.Just fuck it.I keep trudging along every day. Eating the same damn thing over and over. Walking at the same damn park. … [Read More...]

My heaven is more awesome than yours

Will Remain Catholic For Beer…

... The question of why we remain Catholic has been asked of the Patheos writers, in response to Pew Report stating our numbers are dwindling.I'm not much for big word-y words, preferring to keep it straightforward.I'm Catholic and plan to remain so until I die and my big fat Catholic soul flies off to Catholic Heaven - the part of Heaven where the alcohol and fireworks are kept in ample supply. The existence of Catholic Heaven has been well documented.If I didn't leave the Church amidst scandal or liturgical abuse it stands to reason that there's not much that would make me go. Not even other Catholics.On the other side of the coin, I don't stay … [Read More...]

How unicorns feel about Bruce Jenner

Bruce Jenner on a Ledge, World Tells Him To “JUMP”…

... I keep reading about how Bruce Jenner is finally being "true" to himself by becoming a herself. I guess when truth is subjective anything is possible.There is nothing truthful about Bruce Jenner's appearance on the cover of Vanity Fair. It's facial feminization surgery, synthetic hormone treatments, plastic breasts, corsets, cosmetics, studio lighting, professional hairstylists, renowned photographers, and photoshop. Lots and lots of photoshop.It's a gross caricature of womanhood. It's pantomime. Sexist black face.It's insulting to imply that all you need to do to become a woman is have a team of handlers, millions of dollars, expensive surgery, and the media … [Read More...]

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Whatsamatta, St. Ann? You got selective hearing?

... Look. I'm writing about something that has nothing to do with dieting. Be amazed.So here's a happy story about a woman who prayed to St. Ann and got herself a man. Not just any man...a Swiss Guard.You want to call me obsessive about anything, call me obsessive about the Guardia Svizzera Pontificia. Sigh. So molto bello.What's not to love? Handsome, single, manly, and Catholic.I'm happy for the soon-to-bride. No, really I am. I love that you all have sent me links about this news story. So. Many. Links. And look, she prayed to St. Ann, just like me. And it worked for her. That's fantastic. So wonderful. What a beautiful story.Can't you see I'm … [Read More...]

its the least I can do

The Morality of Weight Loss…

... What week is it now? Something like Week 7, I think. For a gal who couldn't commit to a nine day novena, I think 7 weeks is not too shabby an accomplishment.Current Weight : 277.8 (down 7.2 lbs)Current Mood : Vacation ModeProjected Outcome : I'll be drinking my calories this weekendThings I've Learned- Pacing yourself to prevent injury and sore knees - That unsolicited advice ins't necessarily criticism - That dramatically reducing your calories while exercising and dieting can seriously backfire. - I am not eating enough (Ha! That's a first)Inspirational- Every fit person I see out jogging, cycling, walking, or at the gym. That will … [Read More...]

Capture

Is People Magazine Glamorizing Obesity…

... On the cover of People Magazine is model Tess Holliday. The headline heralds, "The World's First Size 22 Super Model, From Bullied Teen to Plus Size Star."As everyone else celebrates this new diversity in the fashion industry, I can't help but feel alarmed that so many people are ok with a 5'5" tall woman weighing 260 lbs and being a size 22.At 5'9" I'm 20 lbs heavier than she is and a size larger.When I look at her modeling portfolio I see a beautiful woman with a lot of spunk and a funky sense of style... a beautiful woman who's going to have a lot of physical ailments in 10 years time.She's 100 lbs heavier than I was at her age and I'm already … [Read More...]

Finding the Inner and Outer Strength to Keep Moving…

... When you've been stuck in traffic for over an hour and just don't feel like cooking and everyone's complaining that they're hungry, you hear the siren song of delivery pizza.When you've been going nonstop since you woke up at the crack of dawn and you don't stop till the end of the day and you can't bear the thought of dragging out the resistance bands and exercise mat.When you have a million reasons to take short cuts in the kitchen or skip the work out altogether, that's when you need to focus on what your goals are.Why are you doing this? To lose weight? To get strong? Better health? Are you training for a 5K?When you've been sedentary for as long as I … [Read More...]


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