The Baby and My Body

We tend to get very identified with our bodies and see them as “us.” It’s not an easy habit to see beyond yet pregnancy is kind of a gift in that way. It is an experience that shakes your sense of your body belonging to you.

For ten months you share your body with someone else and things you thought were all yours become influenced by someone else. It’s not just your torso growing bigger. You and your child are negotiating for the energy that your body has (and the baby always wins). The taste of food changes. Your baby makes his preferences in food known and so your taste buds are no longer your own. One of my friends said she knew she was having a boy because she kept dreaming about firetrucks and airplanes.

Nothing in my body is mine right now. Every system is tuned to what the baby wants and needs. My stomach shoved out of the way, my lung capacity cut short, my energy levels in the gutter. It’s a fascinating learning experience.

Who am I when my dreams, thoughts, and desires are influenced by someone else sharing my body? Where is the root of my identity located?