Answering ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’ – How To Be Loving And Friendly When You Don’t Approve Of Someones Actions?

Answering ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’ – How To Be Loving And Friendly When You Don’t Approve Of Someones Actions? January 4, 2017

AnsweringAnother installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical,  rational and the best possible solution, in other words 180 degree turn from Debi and friends answers. As always all spelling and grammar in the posting is unchanged from the original author.

How to be loving and friendly when you don’t approve of someones actions?

My brother has been dating a Christian girl for about 4 months. She’s nice enough but their relationship concerns me because of their lack of foresight and willingness to seek counsel and wisdom from others, specifically from godly adults. They are very concerend about being a “couple” and are the most akaward people to be around right now. They hold hands all the time, are always touching and sitting very close, and always isolate themselves in group settings to wisper and talk. Their relationship seems very shallow and it concerns me because marriage is a very serious thing.

My family has gone through some struggles and my brother has been hurt but is using it as an excuse for rebellion. He is not teachable at all and does not really agree with my parents on many things. I have always been seen as the goody two shoes because I shared my parents convictions. My brother and I had been fairly close for a while but then he started dating this girl and both of them kind of abandoned all other friendships to be a couple.

My brother does not really seem to like me lately and I feel like they think I’m judging them all the time. After my harsh words above, you might think I am too but I have not shared these things above with anyone else. I have always analyzed people’s charater to gather wisdom for my own life. I am not mad at my brother or this girl at all, maybe somewhat sad that they are not holding out for better things. I always try to be nice and sweet but they really seem to not like me. They last time I saw them they thoughtlessly said some very hurtful things that I feel show their true feelings towards me.

I think my brother is upset at me because he knows what my convictions are. In fact, I have not said or done anything that should give offense. I have really tried to remember if I have and have even asked my parents if I might have done something.

So, my question I guess, does anyone have any wisdom to share with me about how to interact with them? How can I be a good friend and encouragement to them. I am not willing to surrender my convictions but I want to be kind. Maybe someone else has gone through something similar and can somehow understand what I’m trying to ask. Sorry this post is so confusing!

She was given a lot of answers, mostly that she was either jealous or making this all about her, which aren’t necessarily bad answers. What would you advise?

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