Spiritual Brothers and Sisters Potential Lovers?

Spiritual Brothers and Sisters Potential Lovers? August 31, 2018

Doug Wilson of Blog and Mablog  is continuing on with his examination of Aimee Byrd’s book “Why Can’t We Be Friends?”. Now he is claiming that spiritual brothers and sisters in Christ as potential lovers and that is why he always invokes the Pence Rule.

Only if you have a dirty mind and very poor self control Mr. Wilson. Most of us, outside of cult churches, are perfectly able to navigate life with the opposite sex AND be friends without automatically eventually falling into bed with these people. Is your ability to not rape so weakened that merely being alone with the opposite sex is too much to stand?

It should be off the table just like with a blood sibling! No one is owed romance or sex from anyone else ever. Not even your wife owes you sex.

And what of it if spouses are dead and they are still friends six months later? Nothing. None of Doug’s business or anyone elses.

Sexual tension is not part of every male-female relationshp! It’s sick that he ever thinks that this is normal, because it is just not part of most people’s equasion with the opposite sex. Nothing would ever get done, life would read like one of those bodice-ripping romance novels by Barbara Cartland. Language would be all double entendres.

Doug goes on to say that relationships with the opposite sex must be treated like guns, with the assumption that the gun is alway loaded. Very bad analogy as most adults are not with itchy hair triggers one tiny moment from having sex.

The rest of the piece is just word salad from which very little can be gleaned.


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Suzanne Titkemeyer went from a childhood in Louisiana to a life lived in the shadow of Washington D.C. Now she's retired from her cornucopia of bad jobs to be a full time beach bum in Tamarindo, Costa Rica with the monkeys and iguanas. She also left behind years in a Quiverfull church and loves to chronicle the worst abuses of that particular theology. You can read more about the author here.
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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Saraquill

    There’s a mixed gender social group I get together with monthly. We’ve been meeting for years, and it has yet to become an orgy.

  • SAO

    Not only do male-female friendships not automatically turn to sex, but mature people, who value the commitment they made to their spouse, can ignore sexual attraction and maintain a friendship.

    Wilson’s theories turn women into second-class citizens who can only have limited interactions outside their families and encourage men to indulge their sexual thoughts, as they are told they can’t help it.

  • Iain Lovejoy

    Doug hates women and doesn’t see them as real people to talk to. As he can’t see why he would want to talk to a woman other than to try and go to bed with them, he assumes it the case for everyone else too.
    I am also puzzling why Doug thinks it would be bad that two single people who had previously had a platonic relationship subsequently developed romantic feelings for each other, or that a widow and widower who knew each other previously might get together after their spouses had died. This would seem to me an absolutely normal thing to happen in human relationships and I’m blowed if I can think of any reason whatsoever why it would be a problem, or anything at all in Christian teaching or the Bible or anything else that would make it a sin.

  • Nightshade

    This tells us more about Doug than I really wanted to know.

  • mordred

    So, biological brothers and sisters cannot possibly have a sexual relationship? Seems he never saw Game of Thrones…

  • Finding Home

    Or 19 and Counting.
    He seems to assume that no boy, ever, would think about his sisters in a sexual way.

  • Aloha

    Doug also shredded the Christian idea of brothers and sisters in Christ. He’s admitted that our holy relationship in God’s family isn’t real. Instead, it’s all about unspiritual horny men and weak women who can’t control themselves in the slightest.

  • mordred

    Yeah, me too. If you get your idea of human relationships from porn flics, though…

  • Suzanne Harper Titkemeyer

    Didn’t Jim Bob Duggar state when Josh’s troubles were exposed that molestation between brothers and sisters happened all the time in church families?

  • Mel

    Also, Jessa and Jill stated that this kind of thing happens in so many families they’ve known – which is a terrifying statement from my POV as a teacher who has yet to run into a case of sibling molestation in the hundreds of families I’ve met.

  • Anonyme

    Yes, and said it in such a casual way, he might as well have shrugged and said, “oh, well, it happens”.

  • katiehippie

    I would never be near this guy.

  • AFo

    If men thought about sex as much as Doug thinks they do, they’d never be able to function. I’m trying to figure out who, besides Doug, goes through their days having vivid sexual fantasies about every woman he sees, and keep coming up empty. Stop generalizing your gross behavior to all men, Doug.

  • Ruthitchka

    Why does this make me think of one of Billy Crystal’s lines in “When Harry Met Sally”?

  • bekabot

    A biological brother who is spending time with his sister knowing, assuming, presupposing, and understanding that she will never be a sexual partner. He knows this down to his ancestors’ bones.

    Doug Wilson should have a long conversation with Josh Duggar. There’s a lot they could learn from each other.

    (Added: I know this has already been said more than once, but I still think it bears repetition.)

  • TinnyWhistler

    It gets tied up with the homophobia too: If you believe that friendship is impossible between people who might possibly be attracted to each other, then the presence of gay and bi people is an existential threat to friendship itself. I remember reading an article maybe 5,6 years ago that lamented the loss of friendship to a sex-crazed culture and mused that perhaps girls were declaring themselves lesbians because they really just wanted closer friendships that they currently can’t have because teh culture dictates that they must fight over boys.

    That sentiment really resonated with me at the time but it turns out my eternal bafflement at why we all can’t just be friends has more to do with me being rather on the aro/ace end of things as opposed to any sort of mass delusion regarding the importance of sex imposed upon the masses by The World. Whoops.

  • Delilah Hart

    When he brought up sibling relationships, I immediately thought of Josh Duggar.

  • Rann

    Language would be all double entendres.

    It ISN’T?????? Damn! Where’s the fun in that?

    Seriously, what rock has this idiot been hiding under?

  • Iain Lovejoy

    I am tempted to say “don’t give up hope…”

  • Anonyme

    or Flowers in the Attic.

  • Aimee Shulman

    Everything he writes about women and gender and sex tells us more about him than we want to know

  • Mimc

    Been there.

  • Mimc

    Only when you are talking to middle schoolers. Even then I think it usually hovers around 50%.

  • Mimc

    I’ve known to families were this has happened. Both conservative Christian families and one of them homeschooling. So maybe he is right.

  • Religion is the greatest source of moral depravity and decrepitude, just read the Pennslyvania Pedophile Priest report.

  • Samantha Vimes

    How does he explain Josh Duggar?

  • Samantha Vimes

    I’d actually think it was a very wonderful thing.

  • Saraquill

    My brother is part of the same group.

  • Saraquill

    Life is too complicated for one note statements like this to make sense.

  • Iain Lovejoy

    OK. Now I feel awkward…

  • Emersonian

    What an unbelievable weirdo…

  • frostysnowman

    He’s like King David. King David had affairs. I definitely read and heard some people using that comparison when the poop hit the fan.