The Confused Mixed Messages of Quiverfull Child Training

The Confused Mixed Messages of Quiverfull Child Training September 10, 2020

Michael and Debi Pearl’s No Greater Joy magazine has another new writer, one that seems prone to using hyperbole and lots of severely capitalized words to make a POINT! Her name is Sharee Moore and her lone article is about encouraging the boys in your life of being adventurers.

I always LISTEN when my boys play together, but I don’t always watch. That mom gene can kick in and I’ll find myself correcting or interrupting their play because it doesn’t look “safe.” My heart likes to run, jostle in my chest, and leap off the ledge every time they do! Despite that, I know boys need the freedom to do “dangerous” and daring things! God put something in a man that gives him the drive to want to do things I’ll later call BRAVE. I’m positive that hovering, nagging, and coddling are three of the worst things I can do for a man child. Their future wives will NOT thank me for raising up grown boys. I teach them to be confident by encouraging the adventurer in them. Boys learn by DOING. I teach them responsibility and accountability by GIVING them responsibilities, and I TRY not to tolerate weak excuses. Real talk: In their eternal drive to “be right,” men learn how to talk in circles from childhood. LOL! Have NONE of it, sis! I do my best to encourage honesty and open communication.

Translation: She lets them do things that would horrify most people on the outside of her little cult circle, play with knives, or dangerous equipment they are way too young for! It’s just easier than actually trying to parent them, and keep a real eye on their activities I suspect.

I teach them respect and gallantry by reminding them to practice being men with me and their sister. I try SO HARD to let their father influence the boys without me inserting myself because I know kids need their fathers for growth. I fail at this A LOT. There are still areas where I have more to learn about how to LISTEN but not watch.

She does not seem to realize as their mother it’s her job to keep them safe, even from themselves. Kids left alone, even girls, can stray into some rather dangerous situations and places that they have no business being.

Then we zoom on over to a conversation going on in the chatroom of she we try not to name because of her narcissistic tendencies. This is heartbreaking advice to beat kids for being uncomfortable around new people.

Jesus wept! A world where juggling knives and playing with power tools is just boys will be boys, but being a toddler who feels uncertain, unsafe, and uncomfortable with others is a beatable offense? The sad thing is if you remove the advice to use personal physical violence against a small child, a child with imperfect control, for whom the world feels like a very scary place, the advice isn’t bad.

Find out why the child views the other person so negatively. Is there some real reason, like with the grandfather that pulls weird faces, that feels too foreign or odd? Perhaps the child is just having a bad day, needs a nap, a snack, or any number of things. You can insist the child is polite to others, but you cannot force them to like certain people. This just does not have to be the big deal the original poster is making it.

But what do we expect in a place run by a woman that thinks that enough beatings will keep people from becoming Black Lives Matter protestors as adults?

It’s not cool to ever call a child a ‘brat’

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About Suzanne Titkemeyer
Suzanne Titkemeyer went from a childhood in Louisiana to a life lived in the shadow of Washington D.C. For many years she worked in the field of social work, from national licensure to working hands on in a children's residential treatment center. Suzanne has been involved with helping the plights of women and children' in religious bondage. She is a ordained Stephen's Minister with many years of counseling experience. Now she's retired to be a full time beach bum in Tamarindo, Costa Rica with the monkeys and iguanas. She is also a thalassophile. She also left behind years in a Quiverfull church and loves to chronicle the worst abuses of that particular theology. She has been happily married to her best friend for the last 34 years You can read more about the author here.

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