No Longer Quivering
by Steven Anderson of Faithful Word Baptist Church – Fights in Marriage
Editor’s note: Wow, marriage advice from Anderson that is not entirely toxic. Yes, there will likely be disagreements, but how you handle them and if they spin off into true ‘fights’ is another topic altogether. Again, talk like adults! But I don’t agree with his assertion that pastors should be up front with everyone about how difficult their personal marriage is. That’s really no one else business. All it does it set up the congregation to gossip. Somethings are truly TMI.
People who are dating or engaged can’t always picture themselves going through marital strife in the future, but it’s important to warn people that there will be some conflict. I remember when I was looking for an apartment when my wife and I first got married, and my sister advised me to get a one bedroom apartment as opposed to a studio. “When you get in a fight, you’re going to need that door.” I couldn’t imagine that at the time, but I got the one bedroom, and my sister was right. There will be disagreements, and sometimes, you need to go to another room for a little while to cool off.
Pastors who act like they have a perfect marriage are doing the congregation a disservice. Hollywood and the music industry are already perpetuating an unrealistic view of romance, so someone needs to give people a reality check. When problems arise, and they will, people will assume it’s just them or their spouse. They’ll think that they must have married the wrong person.
I can honestly say that my marriage is better now than when I was a newlywed, but I’d be lying if I said it has always been wonderful. We’ve had our ups and downs just like everyone else. Hopefully, you have gotten off to a good start in your relationship, but don’t be surprised when things get ugly.
QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders, cultural enforcers and those that seek to keep women submitted to men and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull and Spiritual Abuse honestly and thoughtfully.
Read more by Steven Anderson:
Stay in touch! Like No Longer Quivering on Facebook:
If this is your first time visiting NLQ please read our Welcome page and our Comment Policy!
Copyright notice: If you use any content from NLQ, including any of our research or Quoting Quiverfull quotes, please give us credit and a link back to this site. All original content is owned by No Longer Quivering and Patheos.com
Read our hate mail at Jerks 4 Jesus
Contact NLQ at SuzanneNLQ@gmail.com
Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In