After hearing yet another variation on the “not tonight, dear, I have a headache,” Dan turned over and tried to go to sleep. Disappointed and frustrated, he wondered why he always had to be the one to initiate sex, and when he did, his wife was frequently less than enthusiastic or altogether uninterested. Even though the question “Will we have sex tonight?” crossed his mind just about every day, when he made romantic advances his wife often seemed caught by... Read more
Guys, in Part 1 we revealed that your wife doesn’t feel forever loved and happy just because you declared your forever love and married her. It reminds me of that groaner of a joke about the man whose wife complained that he rarely said ‘I love you.’ His response: “Why do I need to tell you that I love you? I told you when we got married; if anything changes, I’ll let you know!” Although that joke gets well-deserved eye... Read more
Guys, if you think things are going fine in your marriage, but you hear your wife asking perplexing questions like, “Do you really love me?” or “What happened to the romance?” see her questions as red flashing warning lights. They are alerting you to something you need to take seriously. (Thankfully, based on years of research into how women think, those issues are also fairly simple to address, which we will outline in Part 2!) I heard this example recently… does... Read more
My brother asked me recently why I tend to wear a particular bracelet all the time. It’s a dark navy cuff with silver symbols on it—it’s beautiful and unique in its own right. But it’s also special for another reason. I got it on our family’s once-in-a-lifetime trip to New Zealand last summer. And it is a constant reminder to me of the need for gratitude. As a little background: Jeff, me, and the kids are all huge Lord of... Read more
Men, have you ever had a date with your wife take a turn for the worse and you didn’t know why? You’d probably both been looking forward to date night, with some time away from the kids and a special outing planned. But by the time you got to your destination your wife was in a sour mood that simply mystified you. Well, maybe you just needed to focus in and take a closer look at what was right in... Read more
I’m excited about my newest research project and I’m at a stage where I really REALLY need the help of a few motivated friends to conduct my next few test surveys! For the next 3 weeks (through the end of November), I am looking for 5-10 helpers who are energetic, outgoing, have good-sized networks they can call on, and are good at talking people into things! Think about the diverse in-person, social media and email groups you’re involved in. Do... Read more
My first job out of college was working on Capitol Hill, and in one early project I had to coordinate getting information from a lot of decision makers. So to make sure nothing got dropped, I also needed to ask a lot of questions. I worked closely with Ryan, another guy my age. We started off with a fine relationship. But as the project went on, he didn’t seem to like me very much. He became quite short with me... Read more
Karen didn’t even need to glance at her daughter’s facial expression—she just heard the vocal equivalent of an eye roll. Her teenager was giving her the usual speech about not wanting to go to youth group at their church … again. Karen knew there was no easy way to require her daughter to attend youth group that evening without encountering a dramatic blow-up followed by the silent treatment. Now that the teenage parenting years were upon them, Karen and her... Read more
Our staff meets weekly at a local cafe. I love the breakfast food, the kind servers, and the familiarity of our home office away from home. Recently, though, I saw this new sign posted near the back wall to help customers find the bathrooms … and my heart sank. It seemed funny, at first. Then the impact sunk in. Seeing the sign reminded me of a time I was heading to the airport to speak on a Christian women’s cruise.... Read more
As Leslie settled into bed, more than ready for a good night’s sleep, Todd walked into the bedroom and gave her “the look” she knew so well—the sly grin and twinkle in his eye that meant he had romance on his mind. Leslie tried not to let a sigh slip out. After running afternoon carpool, juggling karate and ballet lessons, making dinner, helping with homework, and returning work emails, she was so exhausted that she had zero interest in sex.... Read more
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