Church Sign Epic Fails, “Apocalypse Now” Edition

I’ve heard Christians talk about “end times” my whole life, but it hasn’t happened yet. Maybe God-time is like the last two minutes of a football game…

end times church — Good thing is you don’t have to give any offering at this church, seein’ how they ain’t gonna be around to pay rent next month. That landlord’s such a sucker!

wet and ready — Wow, now that’s a church who is excited about the end times. I mean, like, REALLY excited.

City Billboard Depicting The Baby Jesus — Well, that would explain the whole no-sex and no-marriage thing, now wouldn’t it?

gods floor — It’s kind of annoying during service though. I mean, he just walks back and forth and back and forth…what is he wearing up there, Gene Simmons boots? Gah!

these grounds — So, pretty much you’re telling me the fact that your campsite doesn’t have toilets is because of…the rapture? Oh, and you forgot an apostrophe there at the end.

epxecting jesus — At first they predicted April 1, but then they figured out nobody would take them seriously if they did that!

rapture points — It’s a pretty good deal, actually. For every ten raptures you buy, you get one free. And Tuesdays are double points days!!!

guilty pleas — See, the reason we protestants broke away from the Catholic Church had a little bit to do with the whole intercessory leadership thing…oh, screw it. Never mind. As you were.

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Mormons Rock” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Family Values” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Pass the Ammo” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “We Serve Minors” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “God Likes Weed” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Crush China for Jesus” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails: “Satan’s Graffiti” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Beer in Hell” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Soul Harvest” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, Advent Onslaught Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Big Ass” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Force-Fed Faith” Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, Hangover Edition

Church Sign Epic Fails, “Chocolate Chip Christ” Edition

CHECK OUT THE VIDEO EDITIONS OF CHURCH SIGN EPIC FAILS:

VIDEO Church Sign Epic Fails, “God Likes Weed” Edition

VIDEO Church Sign Epic Fails, “Big Ass” Edition

“Satan’s Graffiti” VIDEO edition of Church Sign Epic Fails

“Beer in Hell” VIDEO Edition of Church Sign Epic Fails

“Advent Onslaught” VIDEO Edition of Church Sign Epic Fails

“Faith vs. Reason Throwdown” VIDEO Edition of Church Sign Epic Fails

“Chocolate Chip Christ” VIDEO Edition of Church Sign Epic Fails

Church Sign Epic Fails VIDEO Debut