Show me your girlfriends, and I’ll tell you what kind of marriage you have. I’ll tell you which ones you may find yourself hanging out with on the single’s scene because your marriage fell apart. Friendship is important, but all girlfriends are not created equal. The last thing you need are a bunch of “Amen Sisters,” women who discourage behaviors that strengthen your marriage and encourage you to tear your husband down. Those are the people you should avoid because… Read more
July 11, 2019
5 Ways to Tell Which Friends May End Up Sitting in a Singles’ Bar
July 11, 2019 By Sheila Qualls
July 9, 2019
Why a Clean House Won’t Clean Up Your Marriage
July 9, 2019 By Sheila Qualls
Does clutter cause conflict in your marriage? Or does a messy marriage cause clutter? If your marriage feels hard and you have a messy house, it’s easy to try to connect the two. But a messy house is not at the root of your marriage problems. I just watched my first episode of Tidying Up with Marie Kondo. Tidying Up with Marie Kondo is a popular reality TV show on Netflix. Marie is a little Japanese organizing guru. The camera… Read more
July 9, 2019
3 Important Lessons I Learned About Marriage From the Colgate Pump
July 9, 2019 By Sheila Qualls
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I learned three important lessons about expectations in marriage from the Colgate Pump. Yep, I’m talking about toothpaste. Expectations in marriage are a huge source of disagreement and disappointment. Let me explain. When we married, I had a fundamental problem with my husband’s expectations about how to get toothpaste out of the tube. Thank God for the Colgate Pump I squeezed the tube in the middle (or at the end or wherever I picked it up). My husband preferred that… Read more
July 1, 2019
4 Ways to Keep Romance Alive Even When You Feel Like You’re Dying
July 1, 2019 By Sheila Qualls
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I recently read an article that said childbirth is a bigger factor in divorce than infidelity. You’re more likely to split up because you had a baby than because one of you cheated. According to the Relationship Research Institute in Seattle, within three years of the birth of a child, about two-thirds of couples find the quality of their relationship declines. Five years after the birth of a child, 13 percent of couples divorced. What’s up? You did all the work… Read more
July 1, 2019
5 Steps to Kill Self Doubt and Kindle Self-Assurance
July 1, 2019 By Sheila Qualls
You’re not the only one who feels insecure sometimes. Everyone does. Insecurity and self-doubt can affect your marriage. A lack of confidence brings on a set of problems all its own in marriage. It affects emotional intimacy and will contribute to pushing your husband away. It may appear as if marriage brings out insecurity or self-doubt. Does he make you feel bad? I thought my husband had this uncanny ability to make me feel bad about myself. It seemed like… Read more
June 16, 2019
3 Proven Ways to Train Your Husband
June 16, 2019 By Sheila Qualls
I was an expert at being a husband. Here’s the problem. I’m not a husband. I’m a wife. But I thought I could “train” my husband to be a good husband. I thought if I could control how he behaved, we’d be a happy couple. So I nagged, critiqued, and complained. I read books and suggested he read a few, too. And I insisted we have an ongoing dialog about the relationship. I tried to influence him by telling him… Read more
June 10, 2019
4 Common Mistakes People Make When Trying to Fix Their Marriage
June 10, 2019 By Sheila Qualls
When my marriage was in the tank, I got a lot of great advice that made it worse. Sure, I read books and talked to people. But none of it helped. So how do you deal with a failing marriage? Seems like when you’re having a hard time, you’ll find there’s no shortage of people who know exactly what you should do. Everyone’s an expert on how you should fix your marriage. The result? You grow more disappointed, frustrated and… Read more
June 6, 2019
3 Signs You’re Wrecking Your Marriage
June 6, 2019 By Sheila Qualls
I was wrecking my marriage, and I didn’t even realize it. Five years in and I was ready to give up. I thought the problem was my husband. If he’d just “shape up,” we’d have a great marriage. He didn’t want to spend time with me, and he didn’t seem interested in meeting my needs. Here’s why. Almost everything he did was met with my disapproval. I thought he’d changed. He wasn’t the guy I’d married. In reality, I was… Read more
May 28, 2019
7 Tips for Making Your Husband Feel Special When Raising Kids
May 28, 2019 By Sheila Qualls
Being a wife and a mom is like having two full-time jobs. Who comes first? Your husband or your kids? It’s easy to tip the scales in favor of your kids. After all, your husband is a grown man. How can you balance being a wife and a mom? Giving your all to your children is admirable but draining. If you can remember how many times you kissed your 3-year-old’s boo-boo’s last month but can’t remember the last time you… Read more
May 20, 2019
Yes, Being a Stay-at-Home Mom is a ‘Real’ Job
May 20, 2019 By Sheila Qualls
My son asked me the other day when’s the last time I’d had a “real” job. He went on to clarify: A job where, you know, you “worked.” I’m a stay-at-home mom. Staying home is a lot of work. And it can be hard on a marriage. Taking care of a household and children zaps your energy, so you may have little left for your man. Coming out of college, if someone had offered me a position with long hours,… Read more
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