When I’d been married almost ten years, I thought I knew it all. At least I thought I knew it all about being a Christian wife. I had almost 10 years experience. A lot of couples don’t even make it to 10 years. I must be doing something right. I was 30, a real adult. I had three kids and a house. My kids were happy. My husband seemed satisfied. What more could I possibly learn about marriage? Looking back,... Read more
God is love. He wants you to be happy. That’s what I told myself when I was miserable in my marriage. A loving god wouldn’t want me to be miserable the rest of my life. I finally concluded, “The God of love doesn’t want me to be married. At least not to this guy.” Click here for “How to be a Wife No Man Will Ever Want to Leave” Challenge! I thought I needed a new husband. While it’s true... Read more
What does your husband need from you? Shaunti Feldhahn, a bestselling author and social researcher, wrote a book detailing things men wish women knew. It’s called For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men. In it, she discusses the surprising truths she discovered after interviewing more than 1,000 men. Here are a few things she found out about men: Men would rather feel unloved than feel inadequate and disrespected. A man’s anger is often a... Read more
When I wanted people to think my marriage was perfect, I was miserable. What looked perfect on the outside was a mess on the inside. I compared my marriage to other people’s marriages and thought, “How can I have a great marriage, too?” Everyone else’s marriage seemed prefect. I learned the secret to a perfect marriage: There are none. When you see a marriage that looks perfect what you’re really seeing is the result of hard work and commitment. But I... Read more
Bad habits in marriage can ruin a perfectly good relationship or make a bad one worse. Don’t think you have bad habits? I didn’t either. I’ve valued others’ opinions over my husband’s, weaponized sex and put him off in favor of the Thursday night line-up on NBC. I’m not proud of it, but my bad habits were creating distance between my husband and me and tanking my marriage. Building a strong relationship takes time and intention. I thought since we loved... Read more
What should a wife do if she wants to improve her marriage? How should she treat her husband? I wrestled with this question for years. How did some women make marriage look effortless while I struggled? No matter what I tried, it didn’t seem to have a lasting impact on my marriage. I read books. I bargained. I pouted. I got traditional counseling. Nothing worked long-term. Turns out, those weren’t the things I needed to do to improve my marriage. ... Read more
Does respect come naturally to you? I’m not going to lie. It doesn’t for me. I’m married to a great man, but I’ve struggled with respect. Partly because I didn’t know I could disrespect him in so many ways. Growing up, I wasn’t taught to respect my husband, why he needed it or how I was supposed to give it. The idea of showing respect to your husband seemed outdated when I got married. Women aren’t taught to respect men. Men... Read more
Men need respect. That’s just the way it is. God made them that way. It ranks a few notches below oxygen. Men, your husband included, need respect to thrive. It’s what allows him to be all he can be. And, his wife is a major contributor to his respect account. The Apostle Paul gave women the key to a happy marriage over 2000 years ago: Respect your husbands. Seems hardly fair. Paul was a man. Yeah, but he’s right. Okay.... Read more
What if you discovered you can change husband and your marriage. This isn’t a trick. The fastest way to change your husband and your marriage is to change the way you think about them. I changed my mindset and changed my marriage. I chose to see my husband and my marriage differently. Thoughts are small, but they’re powerful. And they can control you. They can influence the way you respond to your husband and the way you view your marriage. Actions stem... Read more
Looking into online dating was one of the best things I did for my marriage. When looking for ways to improve my marriage, online dating made me appreciate my husband and want to keep working on our marriage even when things seem tough. I didn’t actually sign up and pay for the service to improve my marriage. I checked out a site because a single friend who was using one was having a hard time finding a match. She discovered... Read more
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