“Til death do us part” was starting to sound like a pretty long time. I was looking for ways to improve my marriage fast. We’d been married less than five years, but it felt like 105. Why? We fought about the same stuff over and over again. I wanted so badly for things to improve. Do you wonder, “How can I improve my marriage fast?” You can. Perhaps you’re in the same place I was all those years ago. You want... Read more
Do you have “psychic-wife syndrome” or PWS? If you’re among the millions of wives who think you can read minds, maybe you should think again. Mind reading is when you assume you know what your husband is thinking or feeling without him saying a word. It’s as if you can look into his mind and know his intentions without evidence or details. And if you’re like me, you usually assume the worst. Here’s what happens when you assume the worst. Early... Read more
Sometimes I assume the worst about my husband without having all the details, which never ends well. I make up my mind as to why he’s running late or why he forgot and get mad without giving him a chance to explain. It’s a huge flaw. I’ll admit. But, am I alone in this? How many times do you choose to assume the worst, causing drama and making yourself look stupid? Making assumptions has a high probability of causing conflict... Read more
Did your marriage get off to a rocky start? Mind did. So why do I share how to build a closer, more intimate relationship with your husband if my marriage started off so bad? Because I learned one of the most common beliefs about fixing a marriage is a myth. It takes two people to fix a marriage is a myth. It’s simply not true. Regardless of how my marriage started, somewhere along the way, I realized I could do... Read more
Do you argue about the same issues over and over again? Do you feel like nothing will ever change? Are you feeling hopeless, lonely and frustrated and you blame him? I felt the same way until I learned something that changed everything. Are you looking at this past year of marriage saying something’s got to change? Are you asking yourself, “How can I change myself and change my marriage?” without being a doormat or being someone I’m not? It’s possible. And I’m... Read more
When I got married I didn’t understand what people meant when they said,”Respect your husband.” How do you show respect for a man? Even if I wanted to be respectful (and I’m not sure I was all that concerned with it), I didn’t know how. For starters, he did things I didn’t think were respect “worthy.” Know what I’m saying? Yeah, I’d read it in the Bible. People said it. But what did it mean? How do you do it?... Read more
Have you ever felt like crying after you opened a gift from your husband? I have. I didn’t feel like crying. I did. Christmas is supposed to be a wonderful time of year. But the holiday season can turn out to be anything but wonderful, especially when your husband gives you crummy gift. A lot of times the problem isn’t the gift itself. It’s the expectation. When your expectations go unmet, conflict arises. What do you do when your husband doesn’t... Read more
“Mary” has been divorced twice and is thinking about walking out on her third marriage. She says her husband’s changed. This is a common refrain among women who seek coaching. Why do so many husbands change after saying “I do”? Why is marriage hard? Marriage is hard because people are complicated. We don’t want to deal with conflict. And we don’t want to talk about what bugs us. If we don’t talk, we can’t understand each other. What if you... Read more
When I found myself in a hard place in my marriage, I did what people who are having trouble in their marriages do. I tried to fix it. I drug my husband to marriage counseling. It was the option after self-help books. Does traditional marriage counseling help? In some cases, I’m sure it does. In my case, it didn’t. Week after week, I stormed into the counselor’s office, plopped down at my end of the sofa and complained about what... Read more
It seems innocent. But when have you ever said to your husband, “We need to talk,” and he’s responded with, “Wow! I thought you’d never ask. I can’t wait!” Probably never because something delightful rarely follows. “We need to talk” are words your husband dreads hearing. It’s hardly ever, “We need to talk about how to make more time for sex” or “We need to talk about what a great husband you are.” If you want to cause tension in... Read more
The Not So Excellent Wife
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