Marriage offers plenty of opportunities to learn how to deal with anger. Did you know anytime you’re feeling angry, you’re actually feeling something else but you’re masking the real feeling with anger? You may find yourself asking, “Why am I so angry?” Anger is a real intimacy inhibitor in marriage. Getting to the real problem is key in dealing with anger. Anger is a secondary emotion, which means there’s some other emotion hidden beneath the surface. Masked beneath anger could... Read more
Praying for your son’s future wife can be a powerful thing. I have no idea who my son’s future wife will be. But praying for my son’s future wife is one of the best things I can do for him. When my son first asked me to marry him, he was 5 years old. I let him down easy when I told him I was taken. But, I assured him God had already chosen his future wife. I pray she’s... Read more
I wasn’t prepared for the moment my kids could legally buy and drink alcohol. And I don’t feel like I prepared them for it either. How do I talk to a young adult about alcohol? Sure, we’d talked about underaged drinking and risks of using drugs and alcohol since they were little. But we rarely have wine in our home. Never beer or hard liquor. So, I assumed my kids would be like me. Rarely, occasional or not-at-all drinkers. So when... Read more
Does this sound like you? He never listens to me. Where’s the man I married? I’m married, but I feel alone. Why won’t he help? I’m not sure I need him. When I start talking, he just shuts down. Do you remember what life was like when you first married him? You had hopes and dreams. You talked to one another. Something changed…and not for the better Reality set in. Life began. Marriage is not what you thought it’d be.... Read more
“Cute haircut . . .” It sounded like a compliment until he added, “It’d look even better if you’d combed it.” Then he said, “I’m Oprah’s stylist, so I just say whatever I want to people sometimes.” I was momentarily stunned. Was it kind of a compliment to be insulted by Oprah’s stylist? I ran into him while in the mall picking up a tube of mascara one Saturday morning. I thought he was a sales associate and was about... Read more
You’re fat. Lose weight. Love, A Friend. Imagine my surprise when I opened an anonymous handwritten letter addressed to me and read that. “Anonymous” said she remembered how thin I used to be. She was doing me a favor by recommending a weight loss product that really worked. Well, she obviously knew me. Within the last year, I’d had a baby and still couldn’t fit back into my pre-baby jeans. If you’re anything like me, you’ve struggled with being comfortable... Read more
Are you frustrated in your marriage because your needs aren’t being met? You’re not alone. Many people don’t know how ask for what they need, much less give someone else what they need. We usually need what we didn’t get. And if we didn’t get it, we don’t know how to give it. Having needs doesn’t make you needy; it makes you normal We’ve all got them. Needs. Here are the top 10 emotional intimacy needs*: 1. Acceptance-The need for... Read more
Have you ever felt like an unloved loser because your husband doesn’t “do” Valentine’s Day? It can be downright disappointing when you take the Valentine’s Day Walk of Shame because your husband doesn’t send you flowers, plan a romantic evening or even give you a card. It’s easy to assume he doesn’t love or care about you when he doesn’t do something you’re hoping for. And it’s easy to forget about the positive stuff he does all year round. One... Read more
Want 19 simple rules for keeping your man happy? Check out the “Good Wife’s Guide.” This list was rumored to have been published in a 1950’s issue of Housekeeping Monthly and contains rules for keeping a happy husband. It details how women can best function as wives and mothers. The list may seem laughable today, but is there anything on this list you think would make life easier for families today? As originally printed: Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even... Read more
1. You don’t have a lot of junk in your trunk. You look for solutions to your problems instead of whining about them. You’re not looking for someone to save you. 2. He trusts you. He confides in you because he knows you don’t gossip. People say good things about you. Your friends confide in you because they know they can trust you. 3. You understand God’s plan for marriage. You’re confident enough to acquiesce sometimes to keep peace in... Read more
The Not So Excellent Wife
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