Three Lilacs and a Statue

by Laura I had 9 perfectly normal pregnancies and deliveries. Well, my ninth baby was premature but things worked out fine and we had her at home and kept her at home. She was just a bit on the tiny side but all went fine. Over the course of the next 2 years, I experienced 3 devastating miscarriages. One right after the other. I was stunned. My body had never betrayed me like this before. I never had trouble conceiving or bearing children. Why was this happening to me? I had never felt this kind of hurt, this bereavement. As a Christian, I comforted myself with the thought that ultimately we all wanted our children to end up in heaven, right? Well, I had 3 that had made it there safely … [Read more...]

Vyckie's Tour de Crap: When I Am Weak

Okay ~ how's this for the kick-off to my Tour de Crap?!! Actually, I'm not sure if any commentary is needed except to say, "OMG ~ Can you see how thoroughly convinced I was of the martyr mentality?!!" WHEN I AM WEAK by vyckie bennett During a dinner-table conversation a couple of weeks back, Warren was expounding on the children's song, Jesus Loves Me. He wanted to make the point to our children that when we are weak, Jesus shows Himself strong. Later in the conversation, he commented that we should "make ourselves weak" so that Jesus' strength can be made manifest in our lives. Make ourselves weak? Now that sounded a bit odd to my ears. After all, self-improvement is one of the great … [Read more...]

Patriarchy IS in the Bible … I think it's even in the Godhead which is part of the reason I've tossed Him out of my life ;-)

Okay ~ I've noticed that over on my "We've been thinking" post about the Birth Control/Abortion Connection ~ you all are already posting comments about just how "Biblical" the whole patriarchy/women's submission/male headship-thing is ... Since I'm such an organized person, I'd really like to have that discussion under a separate post. Only I don't have time this morning to write my thoughts down on the subject. So ~ I've put the summary of my thoughts in the subject title ~ and I'll be back after a while to write the rest of it. For now ~ don't wait on me ... go ahead and bring your thoughts and comments over here to this post. I'd love to hear from you ~ I truly appreciate the respectful … [Read more...]

Vyckie's Tour de Crap

Just thought I'd post a little note to say, "Happy Monday, everyone!" We enjoyed a wonderful weekend with friends and family. Sunday evening we celebrated Wesley's 6th birthday with a little party ~ pizza, X-box games, presents and yummy strawberry jello cake ~ fun! Angel was here, along with her boyfriend Aaron and another friend ~ she has a new car that she got at a ridiculously low price ~ so we went for a drive and that gave us a few minutes to talk. She's written her reaction to the "Daughters" section of Kathryn Joyce's book Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement ~ I'll be posting that here soon. Once again, I want to say "Thank you" to those of you who are following … [Read more...]

I want my Mommy!!!!

by Laura I thought about my mom. I thought about if my daughter was told she was clinically depressed, I would want her to tell me so I could love her up and help her. But I had been estranged from my mom for so long. She would call me about every 3 months just to make sure I was okay. The calls were always hard on both of us. If I was feeling especially pious, I would usually end up arguing with her and saying some negative thing to her. But most often we were just sad and talked about nothing important. I hardly talked to her about her grandkids because it was too painful for her to hear. Almost every time we spoke, I would get off the phone and beg my husband, "Can't we handle this … [Read more...]

It's about STRONG WOMEN

by Vyckie   My oldest daughter, Angel and my mom, Lou Ann. So many of the visitors who are reading the stories on this blog have left a comment to the affect that, "You & Laura are amazingly strong women." I've actually done some thinking about that ~ and wanted to share a bit of it here. We have been "strong," yes ~ but is that such a good thing? For myself, I finally realized that being so strong enabled me to live a life that was not healthy for me or my children ~ or for my ex-husband for that matter. As long as I could "handle it" ~ I did. Allow me to boast for just a minute about how "strong" I was. I was so "strong" that I bore seven children ~ six of them in eleven years ~ … [Read more...]

The Amazing Bosch Universal Mixer

by Laura When I was living on the farm we grew almost all of our own food. We planted our own wheat and then harvested it with a pull type combine hooked up to our antique John Deere 70 tractor. We had a hand cranked fanning mill (another antique) to clean the wheat which was quite the operation. One of the bigger kids would crank the giant handle to produce the wind and shaking needed to send that wheat through the fanning mill screens and discard all the impurities. Well almost all. Inevitably there would be little bits of “stuff” that was the same size and shape as the wheat berries that would escape the cleaning process. With our home grown organic wheat berries in hand, I would … [Read more...]

A Great Big "THANK YOU!!!!"

by Vyckie I've been reading through the comments which have been posted on this blog ~ and feeling pretty overwhelmed by the kindness, support and thoughtfulness of our readers. I sure wish there was more time to respond ~ much of the dialog going on between posters is incredibly insightful. Nearly every comment makes me think, "Oh ~ I want to write about that too!" ~ and I am keeping a list of topics that I hope to address in the future. I honestly had no idea that there were so many others who were totally steeped in this lifestyle and then left the movement. It's really encouraging to me ~ makes me hopeful that what we're doing here could help other women either escape their own … [Read more...]

The Evil Demon of Depression

by Laura Things were very hard for me. I was so depressed and confused. I would spend most of my day closed up in my bedroom crying. I didn't know what to do to turn my husband's heart back to me. I remember sitting at the table one day and telling him I would gladly begin wearing a head covering again if this would make him happy. He said something to the effect that he had seen women wearing head coverings that were not the least bit submissive to their authorities and women who didn't wear one who were. I wasn't sure if I fit into the former category but I was afraid to ask. I had worn a head covering for about 3 years thinking that it made me more spiritual. It was an outward sign of … [Read more...]

QUIVERFULL: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement ~ A Review

by Vyckie The reason I am telling my story now (as opposed to 10 years from now when my kids are grown up and I actually have time to write), is because I came across this article on Alternet and read with interest about the people and the teachings which our family had followed for many years. I was kind of amazed that someone on that liberal news site knew about this movement ~ so I posted a comment on the article ~ and that's how I got in touch with Kathryn Joyce, author of Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement. I pre-ordered the book and as I read it, I kept saying aloud, "I know these people!" All the names were familiar to me ~ Nancy Campbell, Mary Pride, Doug … [Read more...]


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