“I will eat less …”

Yeah, that’s pretty much the essence of dieting, but it’s also what makes dieting so hard. It’s quite difficult to avoid eating when you’re hungry — yeah, we EVOLVED that way. You’ve got to eat to live, so humans, particularly women of child-bearing age have a good instinct to eat.

The other problem is that your moods might go wonky when you’re calorie-deprived. That can be a big problem for working (like homeschooling, housekeeping and child-rearing) moms. You might lose concentration and have less energy.

So why the simplified solution to “chubby wife”? Lori is just flaunting her skinniness and self-control. The only thing better than being thin, is being thin and judging everyone else who isn’t.

I’ve known too many people who’ve gone on fad diets or “fasts” only to gain the weight back and then some. Losing weight is hard, and to just boil it down to “eat less, you cow!” oversimplifies and puts the blame on someone who is probably trying very hard. In other words, it’s the quintessential Lori solution.

What would a caring husband do? He’d talk to his wife about the issue, identify some solutions and support her following them. Does she not get enough exercise? Maybe he takes walks with her or gets home early to look after the kids while she goes to the gym. Does she eat too much junk food? Maybe encourage healthier snacks. And the big one — if he’s overweight, too, he also eats less and has fruit for dessert, instead of ordering a big pizza and expecting her to eat only a small slice while he swill beer and gobbles down the rest.

Really? You should know that men are only abusive to wives who aren’t properly submissive. Get submissive! Life will be perfect and you’ll hate your life for 24 hours a day, but it will totally be worth it.

Blerg.

She’s definitely in lollipop territory which is very, very bad. She’s undoubtedly starving herself, which isn’t going to help her mental state.

What would a caring husband do if his wife became completely submissive? Aside from being horrified, he’d probably find himself watching his every word to avoid overruling her, giving work to her, or otherwise sparking a disaster. Mention to her that you saw an ad for tacos and it made you hungry? She’ll start making you tacos even if the fridge is completely full of leftovers. Make a comment that inadvertently implies she’s putting on weight? She goes on a starvation diet. He’d never be able to speak his mind openly to her, and he’d never be able to trust any response from her was honest instead of what she thought he wanted.

I once had a friend who was a bit too agreeable. Not nearly to the degree of the submissive wife Lori touts, but she’d agree to things she didn’t actually want to do and suggest things she thought other people wanted because she wanted them to be happy. At least she’d speak up if she was truly against something, but it was sometimes exhausting to try to get her to state her own preferences. Living with someone who was even more agreeable sounds like a complete nightmare.

Yeah. Jerkface (ex) always had to have complete control over grocery shopping, then would complain that I “wasted” food by either not eating it or horking it up after (because he’d always get things I can’t digest, and I’m a stress-puker). Meanwhile, he’s leaving things out of the fridge, letting things rot in the fridge, and actually wasting food. The few times I managed to get things we could both enjoy, he’d ruin it for me by eating all of it, or acting like it was a huge gesture of “kindness” on his part that he’d so “graciously” “allowed” me a “treat”.

On top of this, he’d then have the absolute audacity to complain — extensively! — about my digestive malfunctions like I somehow managed to deliberately induce IBS just to spite him. (If only I had that kind of control over my guts…)

That’s so beyond belief. One tarnished knight who deserved to get speared!

That pathetic title on the first picture is real? How pitiful; look at those average men. I mean ALL men are too average to carry the standard jerks like Lori say they do.

Yes, a thousand times yes. This is an incredibly sensitive topic for many couples. It took us years to work out gentle language and agree on an eating and exercise routine that helps us both.

Instead of talking about appearance, we talk about our schedule and what we have eaten today. Since both of us have to exercise for health reasons, we also have doctors who encourage us, praise us, and give us clues about what exercise is adequate.

I would join Jenny but it’s not the guts I would target.

Yes, I have a friend who is always trying to not be a nuisance and ends up being a huge nuisance. Instead of stating what she needs (we’re all in our 5-s and have various issues) she proposes things that no one has asked for, trying to avoid any possible conflicts. The result is she says she’ll sleep in a tent, she likes to camp. Okay, fine. But then it turns out she doesn’t really want to camp and one of us could have brought an airbed, to have a comfortable place to sleep if we’d known there would be one more person than beds.

She agrees to go hiking, but then isn’t in good enough shape and her dog can’t hike either, so now, at the top of the mountain, we have a dog and a friend who are not really in shape to hike down, when we could have done a flat walk along a trail where there are bus stops and gone back to the car on a bus, if we needed to.

In the end, you have to play a tedious guessing game to figure out what will actually work for her and if you get it wrong, there’s a problem.

I’ve read the Bible from cover to cover; I’ve read the Apocrypha too; I’ve even read some of the supplementary stuff, and while I’ve found lots of material in these books which might be called antifemale, one of the things I’ve never found is…husbands nagging wives about their weight. Biblically, that’s a thing which doesn’t exist, or at least is never adverted to. The strictly-Biblical reply of a wife to a husband who tells her “you’re starting to get podgy and you need to lose weight” would be neither “yes, master” nor “mind your own business”, but “hunh”? So, Lori is making things up — not for the first time. (It started out fun, but it’s losing its charm.)

One of my grandmothers was naturally thin like that her whole life. I’ve met other women like that too. So I wouldn’t think there was something up with Lori just from looking at her. But then there’s all the words…

Someone call the mad man in the blue police box!

Second thought; Lori is really a Slitheen, squished into way too small of a human suit.