Armstrong Fan Club #3: Mary Hammond, Anti-Apologetics Oracle

Armstrong Fan Club #3: Mary Hammond, Anti-Apologetics Oracle March 5, 2019

Mary Hammond is a Catholic. She wrote all of the words below (save for a few on her page) on my own [public] Facebook page [see the entire unabridged discussion], in April 2017  [see also another related Facebook thread where she was active]. Her words will be in blue.


I put forth to you right now that Dave Armstrong, without regard to who trained the ass, educated the ass, is a reflection of exactly what’s wrong with the Catholic Church in America today. If you want to know why it’s split and disfunctional [sic] as a unifying force? Look at Dave. He is the spitting image. . . . Dave Armstrong- you as a heart- aren’t worth the Tomahawk payload to blow you to hell.

Once again, the wisdom of Jesus is manifest:

Matthew 10:36 and a man’s foes will be those of his own household. [the Bible talks about the “household of faith” also]

Matthew 5:11-12 Blessed are you when men revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account.[12] Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so men persecuted the prophets who were before you. [I’m clearly greatly blessed today! Praise God!]

Matthew 10:22, 24-25 and you will be hated by all for my name’s sake. But he who endures to the end will be saved. . . . [24] A disciple is not above his teacher, nor a servant above his master; [25] it is enough for the disciple to be like his teacher, and the servant like his master. If they have called the master of the house Be-el’zebul, how much more will they malign those of his household.”

Someone asked me what I wrote, that brought out the unhinged tirade above? Bottom line: I objected to Mark Shea claiming that every Trump voter is a “bad Catholic.” And I objected to being outrageously characterized as placing Trump above Christ, the Church, and the pope.

Mary reminds me of a funny saying from Winston Churchill. Some woman who didn’t like him much said, “Sir, if I were your wife, I’d put poison in your tea.” The great man replied, “Madame, if you were my wife, I’d drink it.”

And if I was your wife I’d divorce you. For being a prissy phony.

You’re not nearly as funny as Churchill . . .

I’m not trying to be Dave. I don’t have followers ratings or clicks to be made dear. You are in this for the money. Not me. Peace out. You are off the rails and too egotistical to know who your friends are. You’ve started a fight with two of them. (Not me). They are trying to convey to you you are out on a limb with your faith and sawing it off and all you do is insult them silly.

Proverbs 26:5 (RSV) Answer a fool according to his folly, lest he be wise in his own eyes.

Some people bring out the best in me. Dave certainly does.

Here is one for you:

Dave Armstrong voted:

To increase the killing of civilian children and mothers. Cause….pro life. 
Dave Armstrong voted to cut Meals on Wheels. Cause…pro life.
Dave Armstrong voted to cut back S.S., Medicare, Medicaid cause….pro life. 
Dave Armstrong voted to cut medical care and mental health benefits cause….pro life. 
Dave Armstrong voted to cut student loan forgiveness to college students cause….pro life. 
Dave Armstrong voted to cut science, EPA and environmental regulations cause ….pro life. 
Dave Armstrong voted to not take refugees cause….pro life.
Dave Armstrong voted for gigantic walls cause… life. 
Dave Armstrong voted for the biggest military budget in history cause ….pro life. 
Dave Armstrong voted to bust up immigrant families cause….pro life. 
Dave Armstrong did all this cause he’s a good Catholic apologist who knows Church teaching. Right Dave? 
The Church teaches all that. Starve the poor. Abandon the elderly, ignore the Pope, and make lots of war. Like Dave. Follow Dave. Dave makes lots and lots of wars. Be like Dave. Be a good Catholic. Make war. Get lots a clicks.

Dave is reduced to arguing with readers and laity cause his peers blocked him lol. Get a clue Dave.

My peers are Karl Keating, Jimmy Akin, Pat Madrid, Tim Staples, Steve Ray, Marcus Grodi, Marcellino D’Ambrosio, John Martignoni, Devin Rose, Brandon Vogt, Gary Michuta, Al Kresta, Scott Hahn, and many other professional and/or published apologists. None of them have blocked me. All seem to think pretty highly of me, as I do of them.

At this point, it’s questionable whether you could even report the time of day accurately.

Dave don’t look now buddy but your peers are over at Assembly of God. ;) 

When you get ordained to rebuke and condemn and cast out demons with Scripture or even to give a homily let me know. In the meantime your Assembly of God baptism is bleeding through your foolishness. I know. My daughter married such a nightmare. The Church had an annulment in record time. It was all the rebuking you see. Dead giveaway. Rebuking is not the same as admonishing sinners. I think if I were you I’d spend sometime wondering who the hell I was before God. Trembling before him certainly is not in your line.

Nice try. My baptism was as a Methodist in 1958. You also show yourself abysmally ignorant (a not infrequent occurrence with you) as to the history of lay apologetics in the Catholic Church. You apparently have never heard of Justin Martyr, F. J. Sheed, G. K. Chesterton, Hilaire Belloc: to name just a very few of many . . . .

I think you better tremble before him and repent for outrageously judging my soul and heart once again. You don’t know the first thing about me: like most blowhards who have nothing but condemnation and little charity in Christ.

Sorry. Did you lie when you claimed to be redone ad Assembly of God? “And I went Catholic eight years later, to everyone’s astonishment who knew me. Not bad for two young chaps getting baptized as young adults at an Assembly of God church!”

That’s what I believed at the time, as a Protestant with Baptist-type beliefs, but it was just a warm bath and a testimony. My real baptism was 24 years earlier.

Sorry. Not buying it. You haven’t left it fully behind. You give yourself status and place that is not yours and you seriously lack humility. Go rebuke yourself. Then I might think there was hope for ya Dave. You spend all day everyday rebuking everyone and their brother. You lack even common sense man.

I’m sorry. Justin Martyr, Chesterton, Sheed, Belloc….none of those were A of G. You follow the A of G way. Attack, rebuke, attack, rebuke. Over and over. Then cry victim. Very A of G. Get a grip.

Here’s another one. Seeing you can’t write anymore just type lots of random wars. Hey Dave heres another one for you-

Dave votes for wars and increased civilian deaths because he likes war and so he likes to start wars on FB. This is about the 40th war I’ve seen him start in a year. Cause he’s an expert on Catholicism, he’s an apologist for the Church, so he’s a good Catholic. Be like Dave. Make wars. Lots and lots of wars. And vote for real wars. Lots of wars with increased military budgets and dead babies. And you can be a good Dave Catholic too. Just don’t drop an F bomb. Dave will excommunicate you for an F bomb.

Thing about Dave is he’s got lots of stuff. Education, reputation etc. But what he sorely lacks for as an apologist is love- either for people or the Church. Can’t quite leave his Protestantism behind. Check the comments around FB from at least ten other apologists and priests today. Dave is a GONG. So he’s engaged in tons of wars all year. Mark Shea [who warmly endorsed my apologetics work, and I , his], Scott Eric Alt [whose wedding I went to], me, Rebecca Bratten Weiss [whom I defended several times with regard to her losing a position at FUS, and visited in person], . . ., Dan Conway, Cynthia Schrage [whose wedding I went to] …etc etc. The list of people who he has deliberately sought to engage on their pages and elsewhere is endless. Because this is what Dave does. Picks fights with people minding their own business and when they finally get enough of his prissy malicious bull cries victim. 

He sends friends to screenshot on pages he’s blocked from and uses other profiles to screenshot then claims it was said behind his back. He’s too narcissistic to realize his tendency to snoop is famous and we post KNOWING he will find away to read it. A sad sad case Dave is. No love. But hey- he doesn’t use the F bomb.

I shall learn from you how to feel and express love, Mary. When shall we start? How about 2 PM every other Tuesday?

I’m sorry. You think your friends are your flatterers and your enemies the ones you are fighting with. Not sure you are in any position to improve on that. I told you last year- using Scripture to condemn people who argue with you is a PROTESTANT thing Dave. I suggest you back up to Matthew 5:33-37 and reconsider your politics. A vote is a form of oath. Your word.

I don’t wish to engage with you.

That’s obvious.

You started this by including me in your fights ad nauseum [sic] with others. Constant fighting you do- bad sign. Peace ain’t in it. I’m just waiting for the old blocking period FB uses to be up and I’m gone. I think you are troubled man. You should not be attacking your readers. When you have your ad nauseum fights with other apologists you should leave your readers out of it. Lest you go too far. Which you did. With me. You have no business blocking people then sending others to spy. You’ve made yourself a huge butt of jokes for that for months. “Don’t mention Dave Armstrong” gets bandied about like Fawlty Towers and “Don’t mention the war.” There is no love, no peace, no charity on your page or in you. You abuse anyone who disagrees with you. And apparently your no does not mean no and your yes does not mean yes. You are still too much of a Protestant for me Dave. Intellectual Catholicism but the heart is something else. But others see something in you.

Why am I here Dave?

Excellent question! I know why I am allowing you to be here in the time while I’m waiting to block you again. Why you keep coming around and making a complete fool of yourself is another question entirely.

Cause YOU took screenshots of my comments in your fight with Scott. You engaged me- a reader- and then because Mark and Scott abandoned you to your filth you are stuck with me. There’s the truth of it. Aye.

Dave Armstrong in a nutshell. 
Trump bombs: good. 
F bombs: bad.

One more for Dave. Who seems to spend all his time typing Scripture to condemn his enemies cause he’s too stupid to know those enemies are the only friends he’s got. 

Matthew 5: 33-37. * v “Again you have heard that it was said to your ancestors, ‘Do not take a false oath, but make good to the Lord all that you vow.’34w But I say to you, do not swear at all;* not by heaven, for it is God’s throne;35nor by the earth, for it is his footstool; nor by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King.36Do not swear by your head, for you cannot make a single hair white or black.37* Let your ‘Yes’ mean ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No’ mean ‘No.’ Anything more is from the evil one.

Ok. Simply. If you knew Trump was going to do what he said and you didn’t want it why did you vote for him? If you did want it, you are not a liar in your vote, just sorely misguided -for an apologist- in what the Church teaches on poverty, human rights, war and immigrants. But if you did NOT want it then your vote made you a liar.  Say, swear, vote for what you mean….anything else is from the evil one. 

Still waiting for some Catholic apologetics. We can’t block each other for another 30 hours and this post is public. So go for it. Apologetics, Dave. Or does that just mean fighting with your readers, insulting them silly, picking fights with other apologists, so you can type long random verses of Scripture proving your readers are the devil and claim you have no time to read cause you are typing-er- writing? What happens to old apologists anyway? Do they just flap their lips in the wind and fade away? I know what happens to em here. They get blocked.

I also venture to say that one of the more truly toxic forms of Catholicism are with those who convert yet never truly leave their Protestant home. They are neither one or t’other.

Mary plays the anti-convert card! We just knew that was comin’ sooner or later.

Proverbs 18:2 (RSV) A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.

Proverbs 18:7 A fool’s mouth is his ruin, and his lips are a snare to himself.

Proverbs 12:18-19, 22 There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. [19] Truthful lips endure for ever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment. . . . [22] Lying lips are an abomination to the LORD, but those who act faithfully are his delight.

Proverbs 15:2 The tongue of the wise dispenses knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly.

Mary would derive huge benefit from a reading of Proverbs. But of course she wouldn’t apply the “fool” verses to herself.

Hahaha! You guys and your pearl clutching. Such tools. Glad you helped Dave lose the respect of his peers? In case you were unaware Dave’s foolishness here is NOT Catholic Apologetics. It’s just crap. Carry on.

Of course this is not Catholic apologetics. I never said it was. What this is, is a nearly perfect demonstration of the unhinged, hyper-irrational, hysterical nature of much of anti-Trumpism. You’re the poster woman for it. Mark Shea is the poster boy.

And it’s worthwhile to take just a few days out of my schedule to demonstrate that. The more people come to realize how extreme and unbalanced it is, the more unity we will have, and that is a goal in Scripture that is a very noble one indeed.

So you just keep on doing what you’re doing. With the likes of you as PR for anti-Trumpism, we have nothing whatever to worry about. He’ll be re-elected in a landslide.

I expected that Christians would act with at least some semblance of Christian charity. In that respect I have often been equal parts severely disappointed and amazed by atrocious online behavior.

The devil tries hardest to divide Christians from one another. Politics is an excellent vehicle for him to do that, because so much discussion of it is ignorant, dogmatic, and subjective, and folks on both general sides (but esp. the left, because they are so secular) have a tendency of making it a quasi-religious affiliation. That was one focus of my take-off of The Screwtape Letters.

I haven’t sought to divide from anyone. I have no problem getting along with every conceivable sort of person with every view. It’s the third-partiers and liberals who despise me. Far too many of them have a very hard time being civil to anyone who differs from them.

I made it very clear in the long thread about the Syrian strike that those who were against it were most welcome on the thread, and that they had a principled, equally Catholic view. The division here is not flowing from me at all.

Jesus said that we are greatly blessed by all the insults! I was telling my wife today (and my daughter who said, “I don’t know how you can take all this junk”), that the insults really don’t bother me all that much as, personally. It happens so much as an apologist, it’s like, “ho hum: the sun’s coming up, the wind’s blowing, gravity makes stuff go down, and I’m being slandered again today . . . yawn / ZZZZzzzzz”

They’re more entertaining and funny to me than anything else. And folks see me having that fun in this thread . . . I’m much more bothered by the fact that Christians can produce these endless streams of lies and calumnies and yet seem to be oddly, utterly unaware of how wrong they are. That distresses me to no end and drives me crazy.

But of course that leads one back to prayer and penance for God’s grace to flow into the hearts of all of us: without which we can do no good thing.

Ugh. So very Assembly of God. So little Catholic. Sad very sad. Smh

Not only are you an idiot, but unethical, a bulky and a liar. Public people calling out private people for their opinions is known as legally as harrassment. You are just amazingly STUPID. It boggles the mind anyone reads you at all.

At least I ain’t asking you guys to “fund” my insult fest. What a bunch of tools. You give this gut money for this crap.

I’ve never seen this level of shocking, scandalous, pathetic division and infighting in my 40 years of being a serious Christian. I used to think the fights among Protestants were bad. They were usually about trivial things: who likes what pastor, the color of the carpet. This is exponentially worse.

I ought to sue your silly ass. Trying to make a profit out of attacking me. Scumbag.

3.00 bucks an insult. Final offer you snake pit. Damn your eyes! I’m starting my own Go Fund Me. Your followers can insult me for a idk. .50 each. You call it catholic apologetics and they pay you for it. This. Apologetics. Worth 1200 bucks so far. Not like you caused with your libel anyone to lose their job or anything. Right? Hmmm? You didn’t do that Dave did you? It’s time you got a real job man. Save your insults/apologetics for the weekend. No wonder Trump won. How stupid can people be? They paid Dave for this tripe and called it Catholic True Quality Teachings. Unbelievable.
You know what Dave? When you block me next time man up and leave it there.

Your wife will cheer up when she sees the money the tools on your page pay you to insult innocent people. But really. You should get a job for once so you can see how it feels to be fired because of libel from some inflated head as yourself.


I have no intention of reading apologetics from a guy who acts premenopausal.

The very fact you attack your readers who are mere housewives goes ty o show you ain’t got nothing left Dave. This is all you’ve got. Gossip, trumpism, slander, calumny, insults and screenshots. Stop blaming the Church by calling this pig tripe of yours “apologetics”.

I really wish he’d spend some time defending the Pope. Oh wait. He’s a Trump supporter. [I’ve defended Pope Francis as much as anyone else online has done: 124 major efforts in articles]

Wilde said a sign of intelligence was entertaining two opposing ideas at once. Dave Armstrong can do that – Trump and prolife.

Armstrong just has no credibility left. . . . An apologist? The man is a joke. 

Dave Armstrong . . . may be the most unethical writer they have at the Patheos stable. . . . complete dishonesty . . . Very dishonest and completely unaware of his own prejudices.

Dave is me three days before my period.

Unbelievable. Why me? I forgot to include butthurt Catholic apologists in my previous post. The poor Catholic church.

It’s hard to decide what is worse. Dave Armstrong or his supporters. Accusing me of slander while busily slandering. (Apparently telling Dave he acts like he has PMS is slander. I always thought definitions were in order in apologetics. Now I know I was just silly). As I said: Armstrong has no credibility left for me.

Ok great totally unprofound, nutty, trite PMS type dialogue with Dave. If that’s all it takes to be an apologist- presto- I’m an apologist. Trained in apparently classic gutter just like Dave. Except I’m better trained- I use occasional F bombs. Mary Hammond- Catholic Apologist. Trained by Dave Armstrong.

I am so tired of butthurt people right now. Whether it’s a white guy feeling unappreciated for “all he’s done”, or a black person on the look out to be insulted, or Dave Armstrong having fits over my opinions (who am I to Dave Armstrong?), or authors insulting critics… Thanks Trumpkins. I lay this ambience at your feet.

Terrifically entertaining, if nothing else! ROFL

Oh dear. Dave said crap. Oh my oh my. And I bet he drops an f bomb or two when no one’s looking too. Cause that’s Dave. Upping his ratings and worried about his rep just like…wait..wait TRUMP. Why don’t you go tweet some insults like your idol and get back to us Dave?

So if you sleep better at night forgetting the people you voted to kill and feeling like a victim hey’ my gift to you Dave.

Getting enough clicks yet Dave?

You are too far gone into Trumpism and not enough Catholic.

It’s only cause you mind your language. Appearance is everything for Dave. His religion goes no deeper than his pimple roots.

Ok. Enough for Dave. He got my contribution. That’s enough to keep him going for a couple days. That man is going to have to find a way to write on his own without the help of the rest of us or he’s going face down.


(originally 4-9-17 on Facebook; discussion abridged with slight additions on 3-5-19)

Photo credit: Alexandre Dulaunoy (3-14-15) [Flickr / CC BY-SA 2.0 license]


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