Spoofing the Visionary Daughters Quiz

[Note: After NLQ featured the Visionary Daughters Quiz back in November, "Jadeswan" posted her own version of the quiz on the forum. For NLQ readers who have not yet joined the forum, here's a small taste of what you're missing ~ :) ]
by Jadeswan
I decided to try my hand at spoofing the quiz. I’m sorry it’s so long but once I got started it was just too fun to stop. I guess I “just couldn’t help myself.” How foolish! Big Grin

(Just a note in case any of what I wrote steps on anyone’s toes: please keep in mind I grew up under this mentality. Yes, it is snarky but only towards the bonds that kept me chained to fear for so long.)

1—How do you respond when criticized /corrected?
A: I begin throwing things at the criticizer and screaming obscenities.
B: I laugh hysterically and start in on a litany of the criticizer’s faults.
C: In all circumstances I love to be criticized. I show a joyful countenance when my father chastises me (with a Biblical rod, of course) for leaving a book on the table. When my mother tells me that wearing my hair in a ponytail could cause men to lust, I am grateful for her sound advice. If no one is criticizing/correcting me at the moment, I go around asking everyone in my family what each one thinks I do wrong. It is so wonderful that I even self-criticize constantly.

2—I like to talk…
A: Nonstop—during funeral services, during my best friend’s graduation ceremony, at the bedsides of relatives who are deathly ill.
B: Only if everyone will shut up and listen to my awesomeness.
C: I don’t really talk at all. I only whisper—mostly Bible verses and quotes of things my father and pastor say.

3—When I talk I tend:
A: To tell racist jokes and ribald stories.
B: Let out the skeletons in EVERYONE’s closest.
C: See above. (Question 2, answer C.)

4—In the heat of the moment, I often:
A: Get into fist fights
B: Call my family names.
C: I don’t really have a “heat of the moment” because heat is akin to passion and passion is evil. I don’t really disagree with anyone ever—except for wicked people, of course—but when people do disagree I try to help them all agree with the truth. If they won’t I go to my room and read my Bible.